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'General Hospital' fan recap: Dead man walking

Season 54 | Episodes 50–54 | Aired Jun 13-17, 2016

This week, General Hospital viewers were introduced to two new characters: Niall Carradine and Huxley Lynch. Of course, Niall isn’t exactly new to our screens, but apparently he bears a striking resemblance to Academy Award nominee Tom Hardy. But Niall isn’t a famous actor; instead, he is presumed-dead-by-many Nikolas Cassadine. Because all it takes for Nikolas to disappear is a fake beard and a fake passport. Apparently missing princes don’t make national news in this tabloid world we live in.

But Niall’s cover is blown as soon as he takes his seat among the commoners on a commercial flight to London. Ava, heading out for a business trip of some sort, is fascinated by her undead seat mate. Ava offers Nikolas words of wisdom from her own recent experiences, specifically not to adapt a fake accent. Nikolas tries to shake Ava off, but she thinks he’ll be less conspicuous if he’s with a travel partner. One person he draws the attention of is Huxley Lynch, who thinks Nikolas is the aforementioned actor, but is almost immediately revealed as nefarious in his contact.

Once in London, Ava and Nikolas can’t shake the attention of their new friend Huxley, who shows up at the quiet pub where they’re dining. Although Nikolas is anxious to head on to his next destination, Huxley hijacks the pair and brings them to Lynch Manor, where it’s quickly clear that Nikolas and Ava are not going anywhere. But Huxley’s interest isn’t in faux-Tom Hardy; it’s in Ava.

Sam and Jason are on Nikolas’ trail. First they secure their own fake passports, since Jason is technically on the run (although no mention was made by anyone of the warrant for his arrest this week, and Dante seems to have dropped the ball on having Sam tailed). There’s a bit of a hiccup when Sam breaks into the pawn shop front to grab their passports and find proof of Nikolas’ fake one as well. The shop owner holds a gun on Sam but underestimates the agility and fight of the diminutive P.I. Jason assists Sam, but, yeah, Sam pretty much had the situation handled. Jason and Sam head to London, where Sam’s charm and a few lies earn them the knowledge that Nikolas has already checked out of his hotel, missed his flight to Amsterdam, and is hanging with Ava. Apparently, overseas, Sam’s P.I. skills improve tenfold.

Back in Port Charles, Brad and Lucas say their heartfelt “I do’s” and promptly disappear from our screens. During the wedding, Nathan’s search warrant of the lake house uncovers the dagger of death. Julian is still optimistic, seeing that he wiped the dagger down. But Alexis stands her ground, firmly stating that she wants a divorce. Julian offers up the idea of marriage counseling, but Alexis scoffs, since his tendency to murder people has left them at an impasse. She orders him out of the house, but Julian is certain that he’ll be back and honor their marriage vows, especially the “’til death do us part” section. Julian uses his time away from the house to shore up his alibi with Nina, agreeing to appear as a human coffee table in the Crimson “Real Men” issue in exchange for her silence about his timeline the night of the murder. Alexis has to listen to Sonny boast about how he’d never put Carly in the situation Julian has put Alexis in (which—HA!), but Sonny figures out that Alexis is no longer on Julian’s side. It’s all a moot point, though, as the evidence tests on the dagger lead to an arrest in the murder of Carlos Rivera… and it’s Alexis who is under arrest!

Anna isn’t present at the arrest, as she has been sidelined from the investigation by Jordan, which isn’t completely unfair. Of course, all of the investigation stuff takes a backseat to the relationship drama of Jordan and Andre, which pretty much consists of Jordan being paranoid that Andre has feelings for Anna. He actually does, but they’re not as big as his feelings for Jordan, so Andre cuts off his enjoyable friendship with Anna and declares his love to Jordan. Anna isn’t really suffering, though, as Emma takes it upon herself to set up an online dating profile for her lonely grandmother. “Zero Dark Flirty” peruses the responses, stopping to ponder “Legal Tender”… and please don’t let it be Paul Horsnby.

Valerie (remember her?) celebrates her graduation from the police academy with a party put together by Curtis at the Floating Rib. Lulu and Dante are in attendance, but they’re more focused on the offer they put in on a house. Lulu and Dante do get their new home, aided by a secret bonus from Sonny to the seller. Curtis is happy to celebrate with Valerie but firmly annoyed by Hayden’s constant presence and her self-absorption. But watching Valerie and her new fellow officers lights a spark in Curtis, and he talks to Jordan about joining the PCPD. Curtis was never charged, having previously resigned from his old force. Jordan worried about his drug past, but Curtis is proud of his sobriety. But he also admits that his role in Tommy’s death (revealing the Shawn/Jordan affair) was what drove him to narcotics in the first place. He mentions his knowledge of T.J.’s true parentage just as T.J. arrives to overhear that Shawn is actually his father.

At the hospital, Obrecht ramps up her desire to take down Finn, breaking into his locker and stealing his syringe. Finn’s refusal to take a drug test, along with the reveal that he had access to the drug lock-up the night Lucas was attacked, do not bode well for him with Monica. After Monica learns of the syringe, she has no choice but suspend Finn from the hospital until the syringes are tested. Finn’s sarcastic and insubordinate attitude does him no favors, but he does make time to bond with Hayden over their mutual admiration of bearded dragons.

And while the writing still appears to be on the wall for the dismantling of #Julexis, at least one couple appears to be on the road to recovery… for now. Maxie tells Nathan that she understands mistakes and forgives him. Perhaps it was Griffin’s words—that Nathan is basically a good person who only shot someone in the heat of moment—that led to Maxie’s change of heart. But regardless, it seems like an awfully quick change of heart.

And for those who knew there was more up with Spencer’s calm demeanor than being a reasonable kid, he most certainly is in on his father’s con. While Laura worries about her grandson’s mental health and bonds with Kevin, Spencer calls Nikolas and promises that his secret is safe with him.

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TV Families

TV Families — We compare various television clans through the years to see how they stack up, from ”The Brady Bunch” to ”The Flintstones”

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The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['header-cm-ad']['peopleAdheadercmad'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad']; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds']['peopleAdheadercmad'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad']; // POS Groups information. </script> </div> <!-- /.header-cm-ad --> </div> </nav> <span class="site-header__nav--ad__cm"> <div class="ad ad-processed" id="peopleAdheadercmad_223x92"> <script style="display:none;visibility:hidden;"> window.peopleAdMappings = window.peopleAdMappings || {}; peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad_223x92'] = {"collapse":true,"id":"peopleAdheadercmad_223x92","oop":false,"companion":false,"size":[223,92],"pos_group_name":"header-cm-ad_223x92","sitename":"cm.enw","zone":"music","targeting":{"cmpos":["globalheader"],"cmtyp":["tout"],"pos":1,"pos_group_name":"header-cm-ad_223x92","adLoadMethod":"page"},"sizes":[[[1024,0],[[223,92]]]],"ad_name":"header-cm-ad_223x92"};; // Init defaults window.time_dfp = 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/.header-cm-ad_223x92 --> </span> </div> </header><!-- #masthead --> <div id="people-time-health-banner"><div id="ad-time-health"></div></div> <div id="site__content" class="site__content"> <main role="main"> <article id="post-588800" class="article-single post-588800 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-article category-music creative-work-11730"> <header class="article-header"> <h2 class="article-header__subchannel channel__color--color"><a class="channel__color--color" href="/article/">Article</a></h2><h1 class="article-header__title">000</h1><p class="article-header__byline"><a href="http://ew.com/author/elisabeth-vincentelli/" aria-label="Posts by Elisabeth Vincentelli" class="author url fn" rel="author">Elisabeth Vincentelli</a></p><p class="article-header__timestamp">Posted on <time datetime="2000-04-14T04:00:00+00:00">April 14, 2000 at 4:00am EDT</time></p> <div class="article-header__share"> <div class="sharedaddy sd-sharing-enabled"><div class="robots-nocontent sd-block sd-social sd-social-icon-text sd-sharing"><div class="sd-content"><ul><li class="share-facebook"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-facebook-588800" class="share-facebook sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=facebook" target="_blank" title="Share"><span>Share</span></a></li><li class="share-twitter"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-twitter-588800" class="share-twitter sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=twitter" target="_blank" title="Tweet"><span>Tweet</span></a></li><li class="share-email"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="" class="share-email sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=email" target="_blank" title="Email"><span>Email</span></a></li><li class="share-end"></li></ul></div></div></div> </div> </header> <div class="ad ad--headline-sibling"> <!-- Advertisement; 300x250 / 300x600 Flex Ad Unit --> <div class="ad ad-processed" id="peopleAdhp_300x250"> <script style="display:none;visibility:hidden;"> window.peopleAdMappings = window.peopleAdMappings || {}; peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = {"collapse":true,"id":"peopleAdhp_300x250","oop":false,"companion":false,"size":[300,250],"pos_group_name":"hp_300x250","zone":"music","sizes":[[[1024,0],[[300,250],[300,600]]],[[601,0],[[300,250],[300,600]]],[[0,0],[[300,250]]]],"ad_name":"hp_300x250","targeting":{"pos":1,"pos_group_name":"hp_300x250","adLoadMethod":"page"}};; // Init defaults window.time_dfp = window.time_dfp || []; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds'] = window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds'] || {}; window.time_dfp.push( function() { time_dfp.defineSlot(window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250'])}); if ( 'undefined' === typeof window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250'] || 'undefined' === typeof window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['default'] ) { window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250'] = {}; // Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['default'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; }; // Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds']['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; // POS Groups information. </script> </div> </div> <div class="article-single__content"> <h3 class="article__creative-work-title">000</h3> <dl id="article__creative-work-info" class="article__creative-work-info"> <dt>type:</dt> <dd>Music</dd> <dt>Current Status:</dt> <dd>In Season</dd> </dl> <div class="article-body"> <div class="article__letter-grade"><span class="article__letter-grade-shape channel__color--background-color"></span><p aria-label="Letter grade">We gave it a <strong>B</strong></p></div> <div class="article-body__inner"> <div class="triangle-anchor"></div><p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. Though it doesn’t come close to the delirious energy of the band’s shows, <em>000</em> is a shot of put-your-hands-in-the-air party music. <strong>B</strong></p> </div> <div class="article-body__show-full"> <button id="button--show-full" class="channel__color--background-color" type="button">Show Full Article</button> </div> </div> <!-- template: article-footer --> <footer class="article-footer"> <div class="articles-recirculation articles-recirculation--see-also channel__color--border-color"> <!-- template: article-footer-section-title --> <h2 class="article-footer__section-title channel__color--border-color article-footer__section-title--third-party"> <div class="article-footer__section-title-inner-wrap"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-span"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-more article-footer__section-title-more--" data-mobile-title=""> sponsored stories </span> </span> </div> </h2> <div class="ob-widget-wrapper " data-url-fragment="outbrain"> <div 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