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'The Magicians' fan recap: Stoned on sorcery

Season 1 | Episodes 3 | “Consequences of Advanced Spell Casting” | Aired Feb 1, 2016

“If you lose control, it will turn against you, it will kill you, it will consume you, change you … into something else.”

A patched-up Dean Fogg lays down the theme for “Consequences of Advanced Spell Casting” when he returns to the classroom to lecture on the perils of magic. As newbies, The Magicians are being examined on their powers. Before unleashing those capricious forces on the world, and after bearing witness to the Beast’s dangerous dynamism and depraved sense of humor, it’s paramount that these newbs understand that “Power does not come cheaply.” Too bad Julia doesn’t have the benefit of Fogg’s lesson.

Here are the top four highlights from the third episode.

The Magicians4. Hocus Pocus Prelim: The students were tested to determine their dominant power. No surprise here that Penny was labeled a Psychic, but what does he have against Taylor Swift and his mind-reading ability? Later we learn he’s also a Traveler. This rare power allows him to pop himself anywhere in the world, including other worlds. Alice is a Phosphomancer. Not only can she bend light, but she can burn a hole in your front door to let herself in. What of Kady? We know she’s a Physical and a traitor to Brakebills, but other than blowing up doors, we never learned exactly what her power is. Poor Quentin turns out to be a “Nothingmancer.” His powers are TBD, and it’s one more thing to make him fill inferior. This not-so-boy-wonder is central to the developing story, so it’ll be interesting to see him fumble his way into hero-hood.

The Magicians3. Best Friend Breakup: Eliot asks for Quentin’s help in finding a missing book, which leads to an amorous reunion between volume one and two, and a painful run-in with Julia. While those books boisterously bonk in the corner (“Love wins!”), Quentin is equally passionate when telling his former BFF off. Not only does he tell her she started slumming because she couldn’t win for once, but he makes her admit she always knew about his feelings for her. When she confirms that truth, he throws back the exact words she used on him when it came to his fervor for Fillory and Further: “Grow up.”

2. Addicted to Adderall: Julia is tweaking out on magic, and her obsession is leading her further down the rabbit hole. Her boyfriend, James, sees the drastic change in her, and suspects she’s cheating. It doesn’t help that she’s being told by Marina to drop him because Julia has to go all in without a net for magic to work. After her bitter reunion with Quentin, she decides to hold tighter to James. She explains away her recent behavior by confessing to an Adderall addiction. How long until she falls off the hedgewitch wagon?

The Magicians1. A Frightening Fountain: Alice is still desperate to make contact with her deceased brother, Charlie. Quentin does a locator spell that leads them to the Van Pelt fountain, otherwise dubbed Suicide Fountain, for the 15 students and one dean who killed themselves in the bottomless body of water. The couple walks away after nothing happens, missing the sole hand that rises from the depths and flips them off. Charming! Later they return and find a lookalike Niffen, which is like an energy exhaust leftover from Charlie. When Quentin binds the spirit, Alice is furious over his interference. Never mind that the evil energy was trying to kill her. The entire reason she came to the university was to reconnect with her brother—and he just took that from her. Hopefully she’ll see reason and realize it’s better to be alive without her brother than dead with him.

What did you think of “Consequences of Advanced Spell Casting?” What magic power do you wish you had? Do you think Quentin and Julia will make up, or will their enmity continue to grow? Comment below—but no spoilers from the books, please.

The Magicians airs Mondays at 9/8C on Syfy.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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