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'Undateable' fan recap: God bless the National Broadcasting Company

Season 3 | Episode 11 | “Danny’s Boyz Walk Into a Bar” Aired January 15, 2016

Undateable is full of mysteries: Is Chris D’Elia’s face made of rubber? Who knew musical guest Weezer had an album coming out? Why doesn’t Brent Morin sing every week? How can Ron Funches be so darn lovable? The list goes on and on.

This episode, we dive into a mystery of the literal variety in “The Case of the Missing Cardigan.” The entire gang helps Brett study for his upcoming citizenship test. Brett isn’t quite as prepared as he should be (Congress does not meet at Congress), but he’s convinced the American flag–themed sweater his grandmother knitted him is his good-luck charm. GO, ‘MERICA!

Leslie walks into the bar and a chorus of “Happy Birthday” is shouted by all the patrons. Candace skips over with a pink balloon, which Leslie immediately pops in her face. Note to self: Leslie does not celebrate birthdays. This does not deter Burski from trying to figure out the perfect gift for his crush. Obviously his plan of Leslie being hit by a bus, falling into a coma, and waking up to find that he secretly married her while she was out is far-fetched. He asks Danny for advice on what to get his sister. Danny passes.

The next day, Brett is in a panic—he’s lost his good-luck sweater. Danny morphs into full Danny Caruso mode, complete with cheesy catchphrases, and uses forensic evidence to help find the beloved cardigan. The trail leads him to a group of street dancers (featuring the extremely talented Joshua Allen, of So You Think You Can Dance fame). The leader’s moves looked smooth, fresh, and completely patriotic in a hand-knitted American flag sweater.

The dancer claims “finders keepers,” and Danny Caruso has to intervene. The only way to settle this matter is with a dance-off—crew against crew. Later, at the bar, Danny’s Boyz gather around an old-school jam box to impersonate scenes from Electric Boogaloo. Rick Glassman was the best of the bunch. He can do a mean robot. Of course, the actual dance crew wins without even trying.

Back at the house, Brett gives up on becoming an American citizen. When he claims that he’s “going to fail and then Donald Trump will become President and throw me over his giant wall into Mexico” (which landed the biggest laugh of the night), Danny reminds him that if a really attractive guy tenderly touches his face, he’ll be able to do anything. My heart tightened, thinking Scott Foley was going to make another appearance! But it was Danny’s facial stroke that gave Brett the confidence he needed to take the test.

Brett leaves and Burski tries one more time to ask Danny for help figuring out the perfect birthday gift for Leslie. Danny refuses again, and Burski leaves, frustrated. Justin chastises Danny for going above and beyond to help Brett, but not Burski.

Later that night, Brett bursts through the door as an American citizen. Should he get diabetes or buy a gun first? The possibilities are endless! Burski shows off the very expensive cashmere scarf he bought Leslie and Danny casually mentions that Leslie will hate it. He gives Burski a candy necklace to give his sister instead. AND SHE LOVED IT. Who wouldn’t want to have the option to eat your jewelry in a bind? Leslie thanks Burski by asking him out on a date. It’s an Undateable miracle!

Love Notes
Justin: Obviously, I’m a great dancer. I don’t want to toot my own horn, but BEEP BEEP!

Shelly: If I rate y’all on a scale from 1 to 10, you were all very white.

Justin: God bless Danny. God bless these United States. And if we get another season, God bless the National Broadcasting Company.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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