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Hallmark for the Holidays: '12 Gifts of Christmas'

5 Night Thanksgiving on Hallmark continues with the least Christmas-y Hallmark Countdown to Christmas movie since The Nine Lives of Christmas. (Do you think it’s a number-in-the-title thing?)

12 Gifts of Christmas
Starring Katrina Law, Aaron O’Connell, Donna Mills

CHRISTMAS CHEAT SHEET
Anna (Katrina Law, Arrow) is great at giving gifts; if only she could get paid for it. Anna is happy to help her sister, Marie, pick out gifts, but her real passion is painting. Unfortunately, Anna can’t get into any galleries, and she owes her sister rent.

Anna stops by her favorite bakery to quell her disappointment, and while there, she helps out a frazzled businessman, Marc (Aaron O’Connell), pick out the perfect treat for his assistant’s birthday.

The treats are a hit back at the office, but it turns out Marc’s advertising pitches are not. One of their biggest clients, Nina Collins, wants to see new ideas in six days. That means all-day meetings, and Marc bumps Christmas shopping from his calendar.

Later that night, Marie suggests that Anna pursue her Christmas paintings, but Anna wants to be taken seriously as an artist; those paintings are just for fun. Marie’s other suggestion of becoming a personal shopper isn’t half bad, though, and Anna prints up some business cards to leave at the bakery.

On his next visit, Marc grabs a card. He doesn’t have time for shopping or picking a company Christmas gift; plus his mom, Joyce (Donna Mills, Knots Landing), is pressuring him to come home for Christmas. It’s been ages since the whole family spent the holidays together.

So Marc gives Anna a call. They meet for lunch and he hands over a list of 12 gift ideas and his credit card. (Marc is either very trusting or very stupid.)

Katrina Law stars in "12 Gifts of Christmas," part of Countdown to Christmas on Hallmark Channel.

The first gift he wants her to track down is a smart watch for his college roommate, Graham. They try to top each other’s gifts every year, but the trendy smart watch is sold out. Instead, Anna picks up a gift certificate to a fancy ramen restaurant and Knicks tickets, to upgrade Graham and Marc’s college Christmas traditions.

Anna drops off the gift at Marc’s office, explaining they don’t really need more expensive gifts they don’t use; now they can spend some time together instead. But Marc wanted the smart watch! So he sends Anna packing.

But Marc’s assistant mistakenly sends out the envelope for Graham. Later, Graham personally stops by to tell Marc how much he loves the gift. Marc realizes he was wrong about Anna, and he calls to rehire her. He invites her to the company holiday party to gather some intel for picking the company gift.

After talking to Graham’s employees, Anna suggests that the best gift would be time off. Give everyone extra vacation days and they can spend time with their families at the holidays.

That is also advice Anna gives to Marc. Anna pushes Marc to call his sister and spend Christmas with his family. He promises to think about it, and they finish the last of Marc’s shopping together. That means their work together is done.

After thinking about what Anna said, Marc has lunch with his sister, and she invites him ice skating. Marc agrees, but he wants to bring someone along.

He means Anna, of course. Now that he’s spending Christmas with his family, he’ll need Anna to get some more gifts. Tagging along during ice skating is the perfect opportunity to figure out what everyone wants.

Katrina Law stars in "12 Gifts of Christmas," part of Countdown to Christmas on Hallmark Channel.

After skating, Joyce calls. She heard all about Anna, and she wants her to come to family dinner. Anna agrees—for purely professional reasons, I’m sure—and she’s on her way out the door when she remembers she’s supposed to be babysitting her nieces. Marc says she should just bring them along.

At dinner, Joyce says all she wants for Christmas is family time. She laments about how long it’s been since they sat for a portrait together—it was apparently in 1885, because she means a literal painting, not a photo of everyone in matching shirts taken at Sears.

Katrina Law and Donna Mills star in "12 Gifts of Christmas," part of Countdown to Christmas on Hallmark Channel.

Things with Marc’s family are improving, but things at the office are not. Nina tells Marc that if they can’t give her what she wants at their next meeting, she’s going to another firm. She wants something simple and meaningful, not an ad that is trying to sell something. (Nina seems like the worst kind of client.) But luckily, Nina’s vague words inspire Marc. He uses one of Anna’s “for fun” Santa paintings as the basis for the campaign and Nina loves it.

Later, Marc stops by Anna’s place with flowers. They make a great team, and he wants them to work together on something bigger. But he’s talking business, not romance. Marc shows Anna the new ad campaign that features her work (without her permission).

Marc thinks Anna will be thrilled. He sold her art as part of a huge tech campaign! But Anna is devastated that he went behind her back. Marc stresses that this will be great for exposure, but Anna only cares about her integrity as an artist! (Or something kind of pretentious like that.)

Marie helped Marc use Anna’s work, and it’s the final straw. Anna decides to move out of her sister’s basement and get her own place after Christmas. (Even though Marie’s basement is literally a fully furnished apartment.)

So Anna and Marc have unhappy Christmases with their respective families. But Marie gives Anna another pep talk. She should be true to herself and paint what inspires her. Also, Marc totally likes her. She should call him.

Katrina Law stars in "12 Gifts of Christmas," part of Countdown to Christmas on Hallmark Channel.

But Anna can’t call him! It’s Christmas! So Anna bails on her own family and goes to see Marc. They both apologize. She shouldn’t have been so dramatic and should be more open with her art. But Marc admits he should have asked first. Then they’re interrupted by Joyce opening Anna’s gift.

Anna painted them a new family portrait (which is impressive, considering she only spent a few hours with Marc’s family and she never even met the brother-in-law?). It’s a great likeness, especially compared to the old portrait, which looked a little like that Jesus art restorer painted it.

Joyce says the painting is lovely, and there’s just one thing missing: Anna. Maybe she’ll be in it next year (*winking emoji*). That’s a little presumptive of Joyce, but hey, Marc agrees, and that ending kiss makes it seem like Anna does too.

QUINTESSENTIAL QUOTES

  • “She needs grown-up money. Like, at least $40.” —Sophia, keep your childish innocence forever.
  • “Find me something to feel.” —Nina gives Marc very little to work with.
  • “Where are you going? I was just about to put in the ham!” —Anna’s mom, I barely know you, but I like you a lot.
  • “I would really like if you were around next Christmas—only not as my Christmas gifter, but the best Christmas gift I’ve ever gotten.” —Marc, bringing the cheese.

HALLMARK CHRISTMAS MOVIE CHECKLIST

How many of the “29 signs that you are watching a Hallmark Christmas movie” does this movie check off?

  • Christmas magic (figurative)
  • Rediscovering the joy of Christmas
  • Family bonding
  • Workaholic
  • Going home for Christmas
  • Huge misunderstanding
  • Falling in love in approximately three days
  • Winter activities
  • Token celebrity (Does the Knots Landing woman count? That’s before my time.)
  • TOTAL: 9

FINAL THOUGHTS

Why bother setting any of these movies in New York City if the only thing New York about them is the scenery shots? Pro tip: Stop making people drive everywhere and live in big beautiful houses.

Is it just me, or did this movie actually not feel very Christmas-y at all? There was the occasional tree or Santa painting, but essentially it was just about presents. Put the “Christmas” back in “Countdown to Christmas,” Hallmark.

And finally, how insincere does Candace Cameron Bure seem in all of these 5 Night Thanksgiving spots? Sound less excited, DJ.

TV Families | EW.com
February 23, 1990 at 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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data-tracking-zone="author"> <div class="author-list-item"> <a class="bold author-name" href="/author/elisabeth-vincentelli/">Elisabeth Vincentelli</a> </div> <div class="timestamp published-date"> April 14, 2000 at 04:00 AM EDT </div> </div> </div> <!-- Article Content --> <div id="article-body" class="article content body clearfix" data-tracking-zone="body"> <div class="padded"> <p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. 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