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'Bob's Burgers' extra-rare performer of the week: Mall Santa

Season 6 | Episode 5 | “Nice-Capades” | Aired Nov 15, 2015

Welcome, Bob’s Burgers fans, to this weekly post, where a member of the Belcher family or supporting character (looking at you, Teddy and Jimmy Jr.) is crowned the Extra-Rare Performer of the Week! We hardcore fans of the animated sitcom know there is always one breakout performer in every Bob’s Burgers episode, so yeah, we should celebrate that standout character!

I promise that it won’t be Tina Belcher each week—but, I mean, she is kind everyone’s spirit animal.

To summarize what went down in this Bob’s Burgers episode, “Nice-Capades”:

It was Christmastime for the Belchers. While out at the OMG Mall, the Belcher children are waiting to get access to a back-massage chair at what one would assume is a Brookstone-type store, while Linda does some shopping. Getting annoyed with the stranger hogging the chair, Louise confronts the man and informs him he has to “share the chair.” The stranger gets up, but informs the Belcher kids that they should really be nicer since it is so close to Christmas. The stranger then transforms into the Mall Santa (Henry Winkler). Louise starts to mildly freak out and reminds herself, her siblings, and Mall Santa that he likely isn’t the real Santa. Sure, he may just be Mall Santa, but he reports to the Real Santa …

That night, Louise has an awful nightmare that she and her siblings landed on the naughty list and got coal for Christmas! Louise tries to find comfort in her family following her dreadful nightmare, but she decides that it would be best if she, Tina, and Gene head back to the mall and smooth things over with Mall Santa. Louise promises Mall Santa that the Belcher kids bringing him cookies and milk is not an admission of their guilt. But things turn sour when Tina spills milk all over Mall Santa. Yep, that did not work.

Back at the restaurant, Louise, Gene, and Tina continue to worry that they will land on the naughty list—and it’s Christmas Eve! Bob, of course, reassures the kids that he is sure Santa will still come. Desperate to prove to Mall Santa that she is nice, Louise comes up with performing an Ice Capades–type show at the rink in the mall across from Santa’s spot. The Belcher children will perform songs on ice about nice deeds they did during the year, and the show will be titled “Nice-Capades.”

Linda, of course, loves this idea, and Teddy offers him and his hockey teammates roles as the ice dancers. Mr. Fischoeder stops by to give Bob a Christmas gift—a box of envelopes that he can use to pay rent—and while at Bob’s Burgers, Louise convinces Fischoeder to allow them to use the rink. Fischoeder agrees, as long as he and his brother Felix can be their opening act. The kids work on their music and lyrics, but Louise thinks it would be a great idea if they just lie a little in their songs about how nice they were during the year. Bob and Linda work on their costumes.

The Fischoeder brothers open for the Belchers, and it is a truly beautiful performance. Just before the Belchers are about to take to the ice, Louise notices that Santa has gone on break. Linda and Bob go searching for Mall Santa … who is shopping for Christmas. Linda gets Mall Santa to return to his post, and Bob finishes Mall Santa’s shopping.

Gene takes the ice and sings a song about how he gave up Taco Tuesday and allowed Regular-Size Rudy to take the last taco, leaving Gene to eat burnt chicken nuggets. Why yes, there were dancing/skating chicken nuggets in the performance.

Fox

Tina then takes the ice and sings about how she saved a horseshoe crab. Finally, Louise steps up to perform and sings about pretty much every stereotypical nice thing you could do. However, she couldn’t finish the song once she saw her refection in the ice. Louise tells Mall Santa that he should let Real Santa know that Gene and Tina should be on the Nice List, but she deserves to be on the Naughty List. But the Belchers get on the ice and let Louise know all the nice things she does for them throughout the year.

Mall Santa takes the ice and lets Louise know that he is going to let Real Santa know what she did tonight. Louise is a good person and a strong leader, and will be on the Nice List! Louise asked Mall Santa for a shark. The following morning, Louise opens a special present from Santa: a goldfish!

And the spirit of Christmas lives on!

And now, the Extra-Rare Performer of the Week is: Mall Santa.
It was a Belcher Christmas; that means a little bit of chaos, but a whole lot of heart! This was a tough decision—because, I mean, there were dancing chicken nuggets. Mall Santa was truly the beating heart of this episode. Sure, it was mainly about Louise figuring out what it means to be nice, but she never would have learned anything without Mall Santa calling her out.

Plus, it was super badass when the massage-chair stranger revealed himself as Mall Santa. It only reminds us more that Santa is always watching, so maybe think twice when you confront a stranger at a Brookstone store. Right, Louise?

Until next time, stay fresh, Bob’s Burgers fans.

Bob’s Burgers airs Sundays at 7:30/6:30C on Fox.

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TV Families

TV Families — We compare various television clans through the years to see how they stack up, from ”The Brady Bunch” to ”The Flintstones”

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The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad_223x92']; }; // Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['header-cm-ad_223x92']['peopleAdheadercmad_223x92'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad_223x92']; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds']['peopleAdheadercmad_223x92'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad_223x92']; // POS Groups information. </script> </div> <!-- /.header-cm-ad_223x92 --> </span> </div> </header><!-- #masthead --> <div id="people-time-health-banner"><div id="ad-time-health"></div></div> <div id="site__content" class="site__content"> <main role="main"> <article id="post-588800" class="article-single post-588800 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-article category-music creative-work-11730"> <header class="article-header"> <h2 class="article-header__subchannel channel__color--color"><a class="channel__color--color" href="/article/">Article</a></h2><h1 class="article-header__title">000</h1><p class="article-header__byline"><a href="http://ew.com/author/elisabeth-vincentelli/" aria-label="Posts by Elisabeth Vincentelli" class="author url fn" rel="author">Elisabeth Vincentelli</a></p><p class="article-header__timestamp">Posted on <time datetime="2000-04-14T04:00:00+00:00">April 14, 2000 at 4:00am EDT</time></p> <div class="article-header__share"> <div class="sharedaddy sd-sharing-enabled"><div class="robots-nocontent sd-block sd-social sd-social-icon-text sd-sharing"><div class="sd-content"><ul><li class="share-facebook"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-facebook-588800" class="share-facebook sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=facebook" target="_blank" title="Share"><span>Share</span></a></li><li class="share-twitter"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-twitter-588800" class="share-twitter sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=twitter" target="_blank" title="Tweet"><span>Tweet</span></a></li><li class="share-email"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="" class="share-email sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=email" target="_blank" title="Email"><span>Email</span></a></li><li class="share-end"></li></ul></div></div></div> </div> </header> <div class="ad ad--headline-sibling"> <!-- Advertisement; 300x250 / 300x600 Flex Ad Unit --> <div class="ad ad-processed" id="peopleAdhp_300x250"> <script style="display:none;visibility:hidden;"> window.peopleAdMappings = window.peopleAdMappings || {}; peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = {"collapse":true,"id":"peopleAdhp_300x250","oop":false,"companion":false,"size":[300,250],"pos_group_name":"hp_300x250","zone":"music","sizes":[[[1024,0],[[300,250],[300,600]]],[[601,0],[[300,250],[300,600]]],[[0,0],[[300,250]]]],"ad_name":"hp_300x250","targeting":{"pos":1,"pos_group_name":"hp_300x250","adLoadMethod":"page"}};; // Init defaults window.time_dfp = window.time_dfp || []; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds'] = window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds'] || {}; window.time_dfp.push( function() { time_dfp.defineSlot(window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250'])}); if ( 'undefined' === typeof window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250'] || 'undefined' === typeof window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['default'] ) { window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250'] = {}; // Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['default'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; }; // Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds']['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; // POS Groups information. </script> </div> </div> <div class="article-single__content"> <h3 class="article__creative-work-title">000</h3> <dl id="article__creative-work-info" class="article__creative-work-info"> <dt>type:</dt> <dd>Music</dd> <dt>Current Status:</dt> <dd>In Season</dd> </dl> <div class="article-body"> <div class="article__letter-grade"><span class="article__letter-grade-shape channel__color--background-color"></span><p aria-label="Letter grade">We gave it a <strong>B</strong></p></div> <div class="article-body__inner"> <div class="triangle-anchor"></div><p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. Though it doesn’t come close to the delirious energy of the band’s shows, <em>000</em> is a shot of put-your-hands-in-the-air party music. <strong>B</strong></p> </div> <div class="article-body__show-full"> <button id="button--show-full" class="channel__color--background-color" type="button">Show Full Article</button> </div> </div> <!-- template: article-footer --> <footer class="article-footer"> <div class="articles-recirculation articles-recirculation--see-also channel__color--border-color"> <!-- template: article-footer-section-title --> <h2 class="article-footer__section-title channel__color--border-color article-footer__section-title--third-party"> <div class="article-footer__section-title-inner-wrap"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-span"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-more article-footer__section-title-more--" data-mobile-title=""> sponsored stories </span> </span> </div> </h2> <div class="ob-widget-wrapper " data-url-fragment="outbrain"> <div 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