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'General Hospital' fan recap: The loves and lives of Jason Morgan

Season 53 | Episodes 157–161 | Aired Nov 9–13, 2015

A long time ago (1995), on a General Hospital far, far away, a young man named Jason Quartermaine suffered brain damage and memory loss after a car accident. He awoke angry, with no memory of his former life, shunning those who were closest to him, and renamed himself Jason Morgan. In 2014, Jason Morgan was hit by a car and awoke with no memories and renamed himself Jake Doe. While Jake now knows he is Jason Morgan/Quartermaine, his memories still remain elusive, and his prior-to-amnesia relationships are in name only.

Jake and Carly arrive at the church to break the news of his true identity. Elizabeth does a semi-decent job of acting shocked, while Hayden gives her and Nikolas some fairly awesome side-eye. Sam’s first reaction is denial, but it quickly resolves once she sees the computer program and DNA results. Sam is devastated that Jason has no memory or pull to her and runs out in tears. Jason grabs Nikolas into a headlock, demanding answers, but Nikolas still plays dumb about the whole situation. Elizabeth thinks that without his memories, this reveal changes nothing, as Jason loves her and nothing has to change. In the midst of everything, Lucas tells Carly about Avery’s custody hearing. On her way out, Carly stops to give Sam a sweet hug.

At the courthouse, Sonny’s sons are called to the stand, detailing how their father is the most awesome father that ever was (eye roll). Now, while it’s not abundantly clear based on logic which murdering parent should be the guardian, the hearing is obviously meant to make viewers favor Sonny. Heck, even Kiki shows up to testify and (rightly) bash her mother from the witness stand. When the court takes a break, somehow Ava and Sonny are left alone in the courtroom. Ava makes a beeline for Sonny and begins taunting him about being weak, feeble, and not enough of a man for Carly in his wheelchair. Sonny takes the obvious bait and flat-out threatens Ava, vowing to riddle her body with bullets and take pleasure in the murder of the mother of his child. It comes as no surprise that Ava records this entire exchange. And since upstate New York doesn’t prohibit cell phones in all courtrooms and has one-party consent for recording, Scott is easily able to play the recording for the judge. Sonny’s vitriol is enough for the judge to award sole custody to Ava, with supervised visitation for Sonny.

Carly finally makes her way to the courtroom, with her car-accident wounds visible all over her face. Before she can explain the whole Jason situation, Carly finds Ric and Sonny lambasting her for not making it to court to testify. It’s fairly laughable and petulant, considering that she had been missing all night, was clearly injured, and never even knew about the court date. Sonny pouts his way out of the courtroom, leaving Carly to fill a stunned Michael in on Jason’s return from the dead.

Jason and Elizabeth make their way to their favorite bridge spot, where Jason wonders about his prior familiarity with the locale. Jason tells her that he still loves her, and Elizabeth pushes that they should still get married right away. Jason, troubled by the stories he’s heard of his former life, isn’t ready to do that. He doesn’t want to give Elizabeth a name he isn’t even sure he wants for himself. Back at their home, Sam and Patrick also try to ascertain what this reveal means for their own relationship. Patrick, reflecting on Robin’s return and departure, talks of how Jason and Sam have both chosen different lives now, loving other people. Sam, through tears, does remain admirably stoic, wondering about the legalities and how to explain this to Danny and Emma. As Patrick readies for bed, Sam brings Jason his motorcycle, mentioning that a lot of things in Port Charles are his.

The next morning, Carly makes an impassioned plea to Jason and hand-delivers him to Sonny’s doorstep, where Sonny has left the hospital against doctor’s orders to sulk over the custody loss. Carly reveals the truth to Sonny, imploring him to look past Jason’s face and see the truth. Once Sonny sees past his denials, he immediately begins to wax poetic about his history with Jason and how happy he is that his best friend has come back to him. But even Carly declaring how much she and Sonny need Jason doesn’t hide the look of pure discomfort on Jason’s face. Jason tells them both he doesn’t know who Jason Morgan is or how to be him. And while his memories will return one day, watching Jason walk away from them both—the same way he left the Quartermaines 20 years ago—feels like a bit of karmic justice.

And even better is when Jason returns to Elizabeth’s and Monica shows up to see her latest returned-from-the-dead son. At this point, Jason is over hearing his life stories. Monica is happy to give him truths, if and when he wants them. But for now, she’ll let go of the man he was before, and just wants to know the man he is now and if they can have a relationship. Jason is fine with that, grateful that Monica isn’t trying to force him into a role he doesn’t remember, citing that she is the only one not doing that. Twenty years of estrangement have given Monica an awesome perspective, and all she wants for now is a hug. If all memories return, PLEASE let Jason and Monica be in each other’s lives in a meaningful way.

Elizabeth and Nikolas are still determined to keep their roles in concealing Jason’s identity a secret. Laura reminds them, as recent events prove, that secrets always have a way of coming out. Hayden lets everyone know that her memories are now intact, although the specifics of when that happened are fairly vague. Hayden is so happy to be bedding Nikolas and living off his wealth that she promises to keep the knowledge to herself. But the surprise that she’s somehow working with Tracy makes her promises suspect. Also, Elizabeth’s declaration to everyone and anyone (including Patrick) that Jason loves her now is surely going to raise a few eyebrows, right? Right?

Jason and Sam meet up at Sam’s home with Patrick, where Alexis has advised that a divorce would have to happen. But Sam is selling the heck out of her confused emotions, basically begging Jason to remember any of their lives and promises together. They end up in a kiss, which should squelch any doubts over Kelly Monaco and Billy Miller’s shared chemistry. The kiss sparks a memory for Jason of sex, but still no emotions. As far as Jason is concerned, he loves Elizabeth. But, uh … if memory flashes are happening, isn’t it time for Jason to get himself to a therapist/hypnotist? Is he really going to cling to the “it’s been a year” mantra when he’s really never tried to get his memories back? The last time he tried therapy, he was still under Helena’s control, so maybe it’s time to try again?

The Jason reveal makes its way to Robin, as Patrick calls her with the news. Robin is ready to reveal all, but her captor with a man bun makes it clear that bad things will happen to Emma if Robin shares the true story of Jason’s return to Port Charles, including live-watching an abduction. Since Helena is under Nikolas’ control, who exactly is keeping Robin and running the show? And why exactly do they have her again? I’m sure the answers will be forthcoming, but I’m not sure how many viewers still have patience for this story angle. Jason is ready to look for answers, and Sam is ready to help him, so hopefully this will wrap up soon.

Elsewhere, Anna is working for Paul and not trusting him. Dante and Lulu choose AN ISLAND as the drop-off point for custody exchanges. Lulu almost has revenge sex with Dillon, but stops herself, realizing that it would be very similar to how Dante and Valerie got together in the first place. And Nina lands herself a job as the editor of Crimson, where Julian hopes she’ll run it into the tax-write-off ground. Nina hires Maxie as her assistant, and I look forward to Nina finding out about Maxie and Franco’s long-ago tryst, even if it was during James Franco’s run on the show.

TV Families

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TV Families

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The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['header-cm-ad']['peopleAdheadercmad'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad']; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds']['peopleAdheadercmad'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad']; // POS Groups information. </script> </div> <!-- /.header-cm-ad --> </span> </div> </header><!-- #masthead --> <div id="people-time-health-banner"><div id="ad-time-health"></div></div> <div id="site__content" class="site__content"> <main role="main"> <article id="post-588800" class="article-single post-588800 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-article category-music creative-work-11730"> <header class="article-header"> <h2 class="article-header__subchannel channel__color--color"><a class="channel__color--color" href="/article/">Article</a></h2><h1 class="article-header__title">000</h1><p class="article-header__byline"><a href="http://ew.com/author/elisabeth-vincentelli/" aria-label="Posts by Elisabeth Vincentelli" class="author url fn" rel="author">Elisabeth Vincentelli</a></p><p class="article-header__timestamp">Posted on <time datetime="2000-04-14T04:00:00+00:00">April 14, 2000 at 4:00am EDT</time></p> <div class="article-header__share"> <div class="sharedaddy sd-sharing-enabled"><div class="robots-nocontent sd-block sd-social sd-social-icon-text sd-sharing"><div class="sd-content"><ul><li class="share-facebook"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-facebook-588800" class="share-facebook sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=facebook" target="_blank" title="Share"><span>Share</span></a></li><li class="share-twitter"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-twitter-588800" class="share-twitter sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=twitter" target="_blank" title="Tweet"><span>Tweet</span></a></li><li class="share-email"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="" class="share-email sd-button 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<div class="article-body"> <div class="article__letter-grade"><span class="article__letter-grade-shape channel__color--background-color"></span><p aria-label="Letter grade">We gave it a <strong>B</strong></p></div> <div class="article-body__inner"> <div class="triangle-anchor"></div><p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. 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