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'Criminal Minds' fan recap: Pervs, perps, and cheerleading victims

Season 11 | Episode 6 | “Pariahville” | Aired Nov 4, 2015

Criminal Minds touches on dozens of subjects. But nothing brings bile to the throats of viewers quite like sex crimes. In this week’s episode, a community of past deviants comes under scrutiny when a grisly murder threatens their very existence.

The death in question is that of Paige Lincoln, wife of Kyle. Kyle is a resident of Glenport Village, a controlled community of registered sex offenders. Socially banned after their scarlet-letter crimes, Glenport (also known as “Perv-ville,” according to the sign) is a haven for offenders to reform and rebuild away from the vengeful eyes of society.

Tara gets the big news of her new opportunity in season 11, episode 6 of Criminal Minds.

But before we can dive into the case, a minor bombshell hits. Tara has been given the opportunity to leave the BAU for a federal job researching convicts. Hotch tells her it’s a great opportunity, but Tara has found a home at the BAU. Conflicted, she goes off to contemplate her future. We begin mourning the loss—we just got to know her!

It also turns out Tara has some history with Glenport. She helped consult the community’s creator, Reverend Santos, on how to screen and profile those who want to live there. Reid is quick to point out to the team (and us at home) that none of the residents have ever been convicted of violent crimes. Kids even live there.

But that doesn’t help Paige, who was found in her bathtub, cut open and wearing a cheerleader outfit. Kyle admits cheerleaders are “his thing,” but he couldn’t have done it. Upon further grilling, Reid and Morgan learn about the community’s hidden rules.

Kyle is an early suspect during season 11, episode 6 of Criminal Minds.

The investigation
Now involved in the investigation, Reverend Santos reveals why Glenport has such an impeccable record. All residents are extensively interviewed, have to sign a conduct contract, and are implanted with a tracking chip. This implausible method of control angers the team, especially the clueless local sheriff (Paul), but at least now they have leads.

Upon examining the body, Reid discovers that the victim wasn’t sexually assaulted, and the cheerleader outfit was added postmortem. Thanks to the tracking devices, we know that only one person was in the house that day: a fellow resident named Randy Nelson.

Tara and Morgan interview Randy on his whereabouts in episode 6, season 11 of Criminal Minds.

After meeting Paul’s children (David and Riley), Tara and Morgan interview Randy. He swears he didn’t kill Paige, as she was his only friend. After some digging, Tara discovers why. Randy was never into the mothers he stalked. He was into their young boys. Since pedophiles are a big no-no in Glenport, Paige was the only one who knew the truth.

But that’s not enough to hold him. Afterward, we see Paul allow his daughter to go to a party the next night. It’s not in Glenport, so he’s okay with her being out of town for the evening. What he doesn’t know is that a new victim has just been axed in the next town over!

The profile
The new victim is Victoria Taylor, a high school cheerleader. The different nature of the kill allows the team to throw out their “Glenport Only” theory and deliver the profile.

A second victim appears during season 11, episode 6 of Criminal Minds.

The unsub is most likely in his late thirties and a resident of the nearby community. He’s experienced, patient, and shows self-control. He’s most likely fantasized about the killings for years, and now that he’s had his first taste, will likely go for more.

After the profile, doubt is everywhere. Tara is wrestling with her big decision, and Santos is already mourning the death of the community he spent years building. Rossi tells Tara to go where she can do the most good with the least personal impact, and Tara tells Santos to keep fighting. She’s on his side regarding the creeper community.

The ramp-up
After some extensive interviews, Reid reports that everybody in the town checks out. It’s time to expand the search to the surrounding area, but there are hundreds of people who could have wanted to frame the town. All they need is somebody who would have noticed an outsider at the Lincoln residence. Tara then has an AHA! moment: Bring Randy back in.

Morgan takes center stage in season 11, episode 6 of Criminal Minds.

Meanwhile, Paul brings his kids into the station to spend the night. David is cool with the sleepover, but Riley is none too happy. Paul promised she could go to the party. Paul says no way and leaves. But kids are easily bribed. Riley promises David two weeks of time on her computer in return for his silence as she sneaks out with a kid she knows from town.

All is fine until the driver, who we saw earlier being a bit creepy, suddenly tries to make out with Riley. When Riley refuses, he throws her out of the car and tells her to walk home. Complete jerk move!

So what does Riley do as she’s walking home? Get into another car with a perfect stranger! The kid at the wheel accelerates and stops short, smashing Riley’s head into the dash. Bang! An unsub! To quote myself on Twitter:

The closing-in
While Riley is having the worst Uber ride ever, Tara is working with Randy. Randy should be able to visualize the details of the day of the murder. With Tara’s help, Randy comes up with a car description. Garcia does some magic, and the team zeroes in on Matt Franks. And the final bit of irony? He’s the son of Paul’s next-door neighbor!

As the BAU screams to the scene, Matt coerces Riley to play out his cheerleader fantasy. In her own house, she leads him to the bedroom with the intention of grabbing her dad’s gun. Matt finds out, and a scuffle ensues as the BAU rolls up. Morgan and Tara bust in and confront Matt with Riley at knifepoint. Tara tries to talk him down, but just as Matt softens, she blows him away!

Tara and Morgan suit up in season 11, episode 6 of Criminal Minds.

As Morgan walks out with Tara, we learn it’s the first time she’s killed somebody. Morgan assures her it’s part of the job and at that moment, it looks like she’s heading to the other opportunity. Say it aint so!

Luckily, Hotch has a different plan. When Tara admits she can’t decide, Hotch says she can take the research gig, so long as she agrees to be an on-call consultant for the BAU. Best of both worlds, and yep: Hotch already got the approval.

As Tara walks out of the BAU to a fantastic Dali Llama quote, we have a Criminal Minds compromise. Tara may not be a regular on the show, but she’ll be lingering in the background, hopefully coming back occasionally to drop some wisdom. It’s sad we won’t get weekly doses, as her character was just starting to develop, but I’m glad she’ll be back on a case at some point. Better late than never.

Criminal Minds airs Wednesdays at 9/8C on CBS.

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TV Families

TV Families — We compare various television clans through the years to see how they stack up, from ”The Brady Bunch” to ”The Flintstones”

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The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['header-cm-ad']['peopleAdheadercmad'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad']; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds']['peopleAdheadercmad'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad']; // POS Groups information. </script> </div> <!-- /.header-cm-ad --> </div> </nav> <span class="site-header__nav--ad__cm"> <div class="ad ad-processed" id="peopleAdheadercmad_223x92"> <script style="display:none;visibility:hidden;"> window.peopleAdMappings = window.peopleAdMappings || {}; peopleAdMappings['peopleAdheadercmad_223x92'] = {"collapse":true,"id":"peopleAdheadercmad_223x92","oop":false,"companion":false,"size":[223,92],"pos_group_name":"header-cm-ad_223x92","sitename":"cm.enw","zone":"music","targeting":{"cmpos":["globalheader"],"cmtyp":["tout"],"pos":1,"pos_group_name":"header-cm-ad_223x92","adLoadMethod":"page"},"sizes":[[[1024,0],[[223,92]]]],"ad_name":"header-cm-ad_223x92"};; // Init defaults window.time_dfp = 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/.header-cm-ad_223x92 --> </span> </div> </header><!-- #masthead --> <div id="people-time-health-banner"><div id="ad-time-health"></div></div> <div id="site__content" class="site__content"> <main role="main"> <article id="post-588800" class="article-single post-588800 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-article category-music creative-work-11730"> <header class="article-header"> <h2 class="article-header__subchannel channel__color--color"><a class="channel__color--color" href="/article/">Article</a></h2><h1 class="article-header__title">000</h1><p class="article-header__byline"><a href="http://ew.com/author/elisabeth-vincentelli/" aria-label="Posts by Elisabeth Vincentelli" class="author url fn" rel="author">Elisabeth Vincentelli</a></p><p class="article-header__timestamp">Posted on <time datetime="2000-04-14T04:00:00+00:00">April 14, 2000 at 4:00am EDT</time></p> <div class="article-header__share"> <div class="sharedaddy sd-sharing-enabled"><div class="robots-nocontent sd-block sd-social sd-social-icon-text sd-sharing"><div class="sd-content"><ul><li class="share-facebook"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-facebook-588800" class="share-facebook sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=facebook" target="_blank" title="Share"><span>Share</span></a></li><li class="share-twitter"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-twitter-588800" class="share-twitter sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=twitter" target="_blank" title="Tweet"><span>Tweet</span></a></li><li class="share-email"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="" class="share-email sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=email" target="_blank" title="Email"><span>Email</span></a></li><li class="share-end"></li></ul></div></div></div> </div> </header> <div class="ad ad--headline-sibling"> <!-- Advertisement; 300x250 / 300x600 Flex Ad Unit --> <div class="ad ad-processed" id="peopleAdhp_300x250"> <script style="display:none;visibility:hidden;"> window.peopleAdMappings = window.peopleAdMappings || {}; peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = {"collapse":true,"id":"peopleAdhp_300x250","oop":false,"companion":false,"size":[300,250],"pos_group_name":"hp_300x250","zone":"music","sizes":[[[1024,0],[[300,250],[300,600]]],[[601,0],[[300,250],[300,600]]],[[0,0],[[300,250]]]],"ad_name":"hp_300x250","targeting":{"pos":1,"pos_group_name":"hp_300x250","adLoadMethod":"page"}};; // Init defaults window.time_dfp = window.time_dfp || []; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds'] = window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds'] || {}; window.time_dfp.push( function() { time_dfp.defineSlot(window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250'])}); if ( 'undefined' === typeof window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250'] || 'undefined' === typeof window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['default'] ) { window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250'] = {}; // Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['default'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; }; // Remember, this is going to just be a reference not a copy. window.peopleAdMappings['hp_300x250']['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; window.peopleAdMappings['_renderedAds']['peopleAdhp_300x250'] = window.peopleAdMappings['peopleAdhp_300x250']; // POS Groups information. </script> </div> </div> <div class="article-single__content"> <h3 class="article__creative-work-title">000</h3> <dl id="article__creative-work-info" class="article__creative-work-info"> <dt>type:</dt> <dd>Music</dd> <dt>Current Status:</dt> <dd>In Season</dd> </dl> <div class="article-body"> <div class="article__letter-grade"><span class="article__letter-grade-shape channel__color--background-color"></span><p aria-label="Letter grade">We gave it a <strong>B</strong></p></div> <div class="article-body__inner"> <div class="triangle-anchor"></div><p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. Though it doesn’t come close to the delirious energy of the band’s shows, <em>000</em> is a shot of put-your-hands-in-the-air party music. <strong>B</strong></p> </div> <div class="article-body__show-full"> <button id="button--show-full" class="channel__color--background-color" type="button">Show Full Article</button> </div> </div> <!-- template: article-footer --> <footer class="article-footer"> <div class="articles-recirculation articles-recirculation--see-also channel__color--border-color"> <!-- template: article-footer-section-title --> <h2 class="article-footer__section-title channel__color--border-color article-footer__section-title--third-party"> <div class="article-footer__section-title-inner-wrap"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-span"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-more article-footer__section-title-more--" data-mobile-title=""> sponsored stories </span> </span> </div> </h2> <div class="ob-widget-wrapper " data-url-fragment="outbrain"> <div 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