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'Jane the Virgin': The top 5 OMG moments of 'Chapter 26'

Season 2 | Episode 4 | “Chapter Twenty-Six” | Aired Nov 2, 2015

Let’s get right to it, Jane fans. “Chapter Twenty-Six” was full of surprises, and I’m not just talking about the last-minute surprise party that Jane tries to plan for Lina after realizing she’s forgotten the promise she hastily made to her bestie three months ago. No, I’m talking about things like new partners and custody bombs and Jane finally making a decision between Rafael and Michael (although, I’m not gonna lie folks, her decision wasn’t that much of a surprise to me … happily).

Here are five of the most OMG moments from “Chapter Twenty-Six.”

Oh! Susanna
Michael’s not happy to discover he has a new partner—bubbly, catfish-wranglin’ Susanna Barnett—especially when he finds her interrogation techniques annoying. However, when she makes a smart connection between Luisa’s kidnappers (more on that later) and a former Miami drug lord who may help them locate Sin Rosetro, Michael warms up. But just when we’re supposed to be wondering if perhaps ‘Bama-bred Barnett is there to make our little love triangle a square (NOOO!), we discover she’s working for the Chief and has been hired to find out what Michael is hiding, which we all know is the stupid decision to let Nadine go even after she admitted to working for Sin Rosetro. Uh-oh.

Luisa returns to the garden
After being released from her kidnappers and interrogated by Michael and Southern Susanna, Luisa receives an email invitation from a site called “Garden of Eden,” which she is sure is from Rose. After hesitating for a hot second, she hits “accept.” I don’t think any of us are surprised she wants back in that garden, are we? Conversely, how many of you are surprised that she ever graduated from med school?

Rogelio’s confession
Step aside, Leah Remini, Rogelio De La Vega just stole your Scientology thunder. That’s right, it appears our Ro used to hobnob with the Cruises and Travoltas of the world when he first arrived in Los Angeles by joining a “certain church for actors” where people believe they are “aliens who are dropped on planet Earth and must find their true selves through self-exploration through a carefully crafted monetized system of levels on the bridge to total freedom in hopes of uncovering your godlike secret powers.” I mean, after hearing that, can you blame him?

With ex-wife Luciana blackmailing him with his embarrassing audit tapes (a sort of Scientology confession) in order to stay on Passions, Xo and Rogelio take matters into their own hands and turn the tables on her by holding her beloved bunnies hostage until she hands over the tapes. When she gives them the binders of recordings (fingers crossed we’ll get to find out #WhatsOnDisk142PartC one day) they hand over the keys … to the house where they boiled her bunnies. Kidding. I think.

Jane’s new babysitter
(Relax, I know fathers aren’t babysitters. Usually.) After Rafael tells Jane that their relationship status isn’t really doing it for him (not even a grid-teeth emoji can soften him) and that he wants to be more than a drop-in dad (awwww!), he drops the bomb that he thinks it’s time they work out a custody arrangement. Harsh! But Jane insists they can solve everything without lawyers and writes Raf a 2,000 word, single-spaced instruction sheet on how to take care of Mateo. The fact that the babysitter guide doesn’t go over well with Rafael isn’t much of a surprise, is it?

Regardless, by the end of the episode Jane and Rafael appear to be back on track to working things out, until …

The Best. Kiss. Ever.
Clearly bothered by the discovery of Jane and Rafael’s kiss (thanks, Petra), Michael makes his move … in two parts.

Part 1: After helping Jane zip up her dress, Michael can’t resist leaving his hands on Jane’s waist. And after Jane tells him her kiss with Rafael didn’t change everything, he can’t resist unloading the big, gigantic secret that he let Nadine go even after discovering she was working for Sin Rosetro. Oh, Michael, Michael, Michael. Didn’t anyone ever tell you not to think with your—cough—smaller brain? When they discover Mateo’s baby monitor caught Michael’s confession, they panic, especially after realizing Rafael is in the living room with the other part of the monitor, which thankfully is turned off. Or is it?

Part 2: Drunk after a night out celebrating Lina’s birthday (and getting funky on the dance floor—seriously, who else will be rewatching until you learn that awesome dance?), Jane runs into Michael at The Marbella. There’s tension—hot, muy caliente tension—and they kiss. And there’s snow (as usual). And it’s hot (the snow was fake). Much, much hotter than her kiss with Rafael (sorry-not-sorry #TeamRafael), and she floats home, where she ecstatically tells Xo that it was the best kiss of her life, and that “suddenly it’s so clear. It’s Michael!” (Pause while #TeamMichael takes a victory lap.) The fact that Rafael heard the entire declaration on the baby monitor? Big surprise. To him, sure, but an even bigger future surprise for Jane, who thinks he was sleeping … and that the baby monitor was off. Uh oh. Does this mean he heard Michael’s secret? Well, well, well. Looks like the ball just got lobbed back into Rafael’s court.

Other notable moments and surprises:

  • The arrival of Heidi Von Ocher, professional yodeler jodeler, who has a past with Rose. The fact that Luisa already bedded her isn’t a surprise, though, is it?
  • The return of Petra’s ex, Milos, who is blackmailing Petra with secrets from her past so she’ll marry him.
  • Hands down the best moment of the episode for me (other than that insane kiss in the softly falling snow)? The nod to The Sound of Music where Scott introduces Heidi—twice—complete with camera turn and she doesn’t show. Standing, slow-clap O, writers! Brilliant!
  • The fact that Rafael has never seen The Sound of Music. Somebody hold me.

Jane the Virgin airs Mondays at 9/8C on The CW.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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