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TV BFFs: Soaps' best friendships

A lot happened last week on Days of Our Lives. Nicole and Kate exchanged bitchy remarks, Eve mourned Paige, and Ben was revealed to be the Necktie Killer (we’ll deal with that out-of-the-blue disclosure in another post). But perhaps the most powerful scene was also one of the simplest.

Bad girl Teresa is trying to mend her wicked, wicked ways, both for the sake of her infant son, Tate, and also possibly to attract Tate’s daddy, Brady. Up next on the 2016 Transform Teresa agenda? Dump Anne, the BFF who schemed with Teresa and always had her back … but whom Teresa now thinks is a bad influence on her.

Teresa dumping Anne was as brutal a scene as any romantic couple’s breakup, and it begs the question of why soaps, a medium initially created by women, for women (how many genres can say that?), pay so little attention to the inherently dramatic subject of women’s friendships. (Read about my attempt to pitch exactly that story to the powers that be here.)

Male friendships, we have plenty of. Right now, on the very same DOOL, viewers are seeing the payoff of an onscreen, on-and-off friendship of over 30 years. Viewers first met Steve “Patch” Johnson in 1985. They soon learned that he and Bo Brady had been best friends in the Merchant Marines until a fight over a woman named Brita led to Bo putting Steve’s eye out (and this is why you shouldn’t play with knives, kids, even in the Merchant Marine)s. After much ’80s-era angst and location shoots, Bo and Steve patched (ha!) things up. Now, Bo is being held prisoner somewhere by somebody for some reason, and it’s Steve to the rescue! Bromance powers, activate!

Meanwhile, the women of DOOL … eh. They’re friends, I guess. But nobody’s rescuing anybody from any prisons. And if women are involved in a front-burner friendship, it’s usually (sometimes platonically, sometimes not so much) with a man. (See: General Hospital‘s Carly and Jason, Guiding Light‘s Maureen and Roger, As the World Turns’ Katie and Henry, and Another World‘s Felicia and Cass.)

Check out three of our favorite soap-opera friendships, and share yours below!

General Hospital

The ultimate women’s weepie friendship movie is considered to be Beaches, starring Bette Midler and Barbara Hershey. A lifelong friendship (with the inevitable falling-out for a few years in the middle) culminates when Hershey dies and leaves her daughter to be raised by Midler. In 1995, GH decided to do its own version of that movie when Monica befriended Paige, a fellow breast-cancer patient, and agreed to raise her daughter, Emily, after Paige’s death.

Amber Tamblyn, who played Emily, was an amazing little actress, and she made the story work. But Monica and Paige’s insta-friendship was always the weak link. We just didn’t care that much. Think about how much richer the whole Beaches homage would have been if, instead of Monica and a non-contract stranger, it had played out between Brenda and Lois, who were BFFs on the canvas at the time. Rena Sofer, who played Lois, was getting ready to leave anyway. So instead of having this once formidable Brooklyn broad hightail it out of town because she suddenly couldn’t deal with her husband’s family, why not have Lois die and leave little Brook Lynn (yes, that was actually her daughter’s name) to Brenda? Throw Brook Lynn’s dad, Ned, and his aforementioned crazy family into the mix, and you’ve got years of friendship-based story!

All My Children

One is a former child abuser turned harmless kook with wacky clothes and tacky accessories. The other is Erica Kane. No further explanation needed.

Yet these two unlikely women formed a friendship so tight that Opal was willing to get arrested just to visit Erica in jail. And Opal was willing to get committed just to help Erica escape from a mental institution. And Opal was willing to get into a cat fight with Mary in order to keep Erica and her husband, Jackson, together.

So, okay, mostly it was Opal doing things for Erica. But considering that was how most (all) of Erica’s relationships worked, it was par for the course if you wanted to hang out with La Kane. And for some reason, Opal did. (Cue Sancho’s song from Man of La Mancha.)

As the World Turns

Alison’s life began when her much older sister, Emily, donated an egg so that her mother, Susan, could have a baby with her much younger husband, Larry. Larry soon abandoned both Susan and Alison, and Susan promptly proceeded to be as crappy a mother to Alison as she’d been to Emily. When Alison found out the truth about her conception, she went bad-seed teen on her mother and sister. Among her crimes were lying, stealing and arson.

Eventually, Alison fell in love with Chris, the son of a man her mother had had an affair with, and a woman whose late husband had once been very unhappily married to Susan (it’s a soap; nobody blinked an eye). The obstacles to Alison’s acceptance by Chris’ family seemed insurmountable.

Except for the fact that Chris’ grandmother, the octogenarian Nancy, took a genuine liking to Alison, and the pair formed one of daytime’s most unlikely (yet heartwarming) friendships. In fact, years later, when Alison had moved on Nancy’s great-grandson, Casey (it’s a soap; nobody blinked an eye), she wore Nancy’s engagement ring. Tragically, Nancy (and Helen Wagner, the actress who’d played her since the show premiered in 1956) died before learning of their impending marriage.

Now it’s your turn! Tell us all of your favorite soap-opera friendships!

TV Families | EW.com

TV Families -- We compare various television clans through the years to see how they stack up, from ''The Brady Bunch'' to ''The Flintstones''

By Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 at 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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