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'Rookie Blue' fan recap: We are family

Season 6 | Episode 2 | “Perfect Family” | Aired July 2, 2015

Well, this episode of Rookie Blue was all kinds of messed up, but the point came across loud and clear: Being a child’s biological parent has nothing to do with how much you love and care for him or her.

Andy is falling apart after learning the news that Sam is having a baby with Marlo. She wants to be the bigger person, but what does that mean? How does she do that? Does she walk away? She poses these life-changing questions to Traci, who can’t answer because she has to go meet with parents who are looking for their missing 16-year-old daughter. It’s clear from the start that there’s something weird with these folks, although the extent of it is hard to stomach.

The couple arrives claiming their daughter was abducted, but it turns out she is alive and well and willingly ran away to escape her horrifying father. As the details of the situation come to light, it becomes clearer and clearer that this man is not fit to be a parent. This is his biological daughter, and he mistreats her in unfathomable ways. Andy realizes that children need love, and that her love for Sam will extend to any baby that he has, even if this isn’t the way she imagined their story unfolding. McSwarek for life, guys. (So, how long ’til something else comes along to screw things up?)

Part of Andy’s ability to come around comes from Traci pointing out to her that Steve may not be Leo’s father, but she’s grateful to have someone in her life who loves her and who her son can rely on. How about we stop talking about how wonderful Steve Peck is, and just have him show up and show us, shall we?

Marlo and Dov continue to explore the possible ways the bomb could have gotten into the evidence room. By strategically cross-referencing creepers in explosives chat rooms with the people who’d been arrested the day of the explosion, Dov is able to narrow down the search to one man. Remember Ted MacDonald’s claim that he had proof on his computer of major police department corruption? It’s looking more and more like he may have been on to something. The guy Dov connected to the bomb provides the cops with explosives whenever they need to blow something up. Could someone in the department have purposely let a bomb go off inside one of their precincts in order to avoid exposure? This isn’t good, and Dov and Marlo know it.

Meanwhile, Gail figures out that the married woman Chris is getting to know biblically is Jarvis’ wife. Chris keeps trying to end it, but naturally she is able to distract him from doing so because he has a penis. Chris is desperate to avoid all interaction with Jarvis. It stands to reason that the inspector suddenly takes a special interest in him out of nowhere. Jarvis asks Chris for some construction help, and also informs him that he’s being pressured to lay off some of his staff at 15. Please tell me Jarvis knows about the affair and is messing with Chris. Otherwise, this is all just a bit too convenient.

Duncan spends the episode with Chloe trying to make some headway on the missing-girl case. Even Chloe thinks he’s a complete moron, so that should tell us all something. Why is he still here?

Nick and Juliet spend some quality time together as well. Whatever chemistry is supposed to be there isn’t. There’s nothing between them, which is fine, because she’s a lying, spying secret-keeper and I don’t trust her. Also, is it too much to ask for Nick to meet a genuinely good woman who instantly sees him for the perfect specimen he is? I am happy to volunteer for the role.

Gail is still just hanging out in the background, working cases, with no development on the personal front. Hopefully next week we’ll get a little more of her. I’d say I want some Holly too, but I’m pretty certain that ship has sailed.

Next week, our favorite cops get caught up in a prison riot. Yikes!

Rookie Blue airs Thursdays at 10/9C on ABC.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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