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'Finding Carter' recap: Taylor knows, Crash returns, [spoiler] dies

Season 2 | Episode 11 | “Wrecking Ball” | Aired June 9, 2015

Warning: Spoilers ahead. Don’t read if you haven’t seen the June 9 episode of Finding Carter yet.

After a relatively slow start to the season, Finding Carter has really picked things up in the last few episodes. First, there was the reveal that Lori is a bona fide psychopath with some kind of grand plan (would it be too much to hope for a cross-network crossover in which Lori is revealed to be behind all of the A drama on Pretty Little Liars? Probably, right? Still, how fun would that fan fic be?). She’s pulling out all of the stops and manipulative mental warfare to get Carter to love her again.

Speaking of Carter, she was so wrecked by Lori’s awful treatment that she slept with Max. And if you expected this week’s episode to slow down, you were wrong. In fact, almost anything you expected about this episode would be wrong. Don’t believe me? Let’s break it down.

Expectation 1: Taylor will really freak out over her long-lost sister sleeping with her first love.

Taylor isn’t happy about the news that Carter and Max slept together, of course, but her reaction isn’t the epic Taylor freakout/grudge match that you might expect. It took her weeks and weeks (months and months?) to get over Max choosing to forgive Crash for the shooting. It took her a long time to warm up to Carter, her own sister, joining the family. Total time to get over learning that her sister and the love of her life (at least so far) slept together? One episode.

Yep. Really.

By the end of the episode, Taylor has formally forgiven Carter and Max for the transgression. It’s mature and probably the right thing to do (after all, she and Max weren’t technically together when it happened), but I never expected Taylor to get over it so quickly.

Expectation 2: Crash was gone forever.

Wrong! He comes back from basic training this week to visit Carter.

Expectation 3: The Wilson family, especially Elizabeth, will always be at least a little suspicious of Crash.

Wrong again. Elizabeth was the one who invited him to come visit and go out for a celebration dinner with the whole family. Go figure.

Expectation 4: If Crash was still in love with Carter and wanted her to wait for him, he’ll have a big reaction to the news that she slept with Max while he was away.

Crash does need some time to process the news that Carter slept with her best friend Max while he was away, but he pulls a Taylor and completely forgives her by the end of the episode, even proposing a full-on, official long-distance relationship. Hello, recurring guest star Crash.

Expectation 5: The Wilson parents have finally split for good and given up on their clearly doomed marriage.

Nope. This week opens with Elizabeth and David very much in love and vowing to end things with their respective significant others. David leaves a message with Hilary saying that they need to talk. She texts back a very dramatic, but also very on-point, “Are we breaking up?” He texts for her to call. She texts “OMG GTH,” and that relationship is over.

As for Elizabeth and Kyle? Well, their relationship was a tad more serious, so she feels she owes him the face-to-face breakup, which goes about as well as breaking the heart of someone head-over-heels in love with you can.

Expectation 6: Finding Carter wouldn’t really kill off an important character.

Crash’s uncle has been following him and sees his visit as a chance to strike. He follows Crash back to his hotel after dinner and kidnaps him so that he can’t testify or cause any more trouble for the family’s evil empire. Crash gets to call Carter to say goodbye, but it’s very short. She assumes he’s upset about the Max thing and rushes to the hotel to try to talk to him before he goes back to base, only to find clues of his abduction. She calls Elizabeth, and the police catch the trail before it goes cold. There’s a shootout and, even though the bad guys are nabbed, not everyone survives. (Now would be a great time to stop reading if you’re avoiding spoilers.)

The casualty of Crash’s terrible family situation? Kyle. Even though he’s wearing a vest, he’s shot at close range during a struggle with Crash’s uncle, who was about to take out Elizabeth. Even though he was just dumped and had already put in a transfer so he wouldn’t have to continue working with her, Kyle was still madly in love with Elizabeth until the end, and didn’t think twice before risking it all to protect his partner and the love of his life. It’s heartbreaking and sweet, even though Kyle was a relatively minor character.

Now the question becomes: Will Gabe be written off the show (sent to live with a distant relative), or will he become a major player, moving into the Wilson house?

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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