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'Mad Max: Fury Road' – Minor characters that need their own origin story

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Mad Max: Fury Road since I saw it on Friday. My preoccupation is for the same reasons many critics have cited already: the amazing production design; Charlize Theron creating a female action hero (finally), and mostly, the attention to detail.

That attention to detail translates to great minor characters and extras; no one is identical to another. Some of these characters were onscreen for mere seconds, but the world George Miller built is so compelling that I want to know how they inhabit it. These are some characters who would merit their own origin story film:

[Minor spoilers ahead.]

Mad Max Fury Road

The Doof Warrior, aka, the guy with the flame-throwing guitar
Why does Immortan Joe’s gang have a blind guy wearing red long johns on a giant truck loaded with speakers playing a double-necked guitar that can breath fire? I mean, aside from looking freaking awesome, what is the purpose? Aside from looking amazing. Is that a punishment for him, or does he have the coolest job ever? Does he get a rest? Luckily, director George Miller has specifically addressed this character in an interview with Fandango, explaining that he lived in a dark mine, passing the time by playing his guitar. Immortan Joe heard him and hired him to be the official “call to battle,” like bagpipes playing before war. I imagine this Halloween we’ll see lots of people in red long johns, with bandages on their heads, holding guitars. Flame-throwing optional.

Mad Max Fury Road

Miss Giddy
Miss Giddy (Jennifer Hagan) appears to be the caretaker of Immortan Joe’s harem of breeding supermodels who conspire with Furiosa to escape their lives as slaves. Is it possible she used to be one of his wives, but then became too old for his liking (not that Immortan Joe should be criticizing anyone’s looks). Even more importantly, what is the story behind her striking body tattoos? There’s small cursive writing tattooed intricately on every surface of her body, including her face. What story does it tell?

Mad Max Fury Road

The Dag
The Dag (Abbey Lee)—Joe’s wife who removes her chastity belt/the blonde wife who is not Rosie Huntington-Whitely—seems to have the most quirky personality of the bunch, doling out insults and praying to “anyone who will listen.” Is she the manic-pixie dream girl of the bunch? We learn at the end that she is pregnant, but not very excited about it. I don’t blame her—who would want to bring a child into that world (unless you’re in the business of breeding warriors)?

Mad Max Fury Road

The Seed Carrier
Not given a real character’s name, this member of the Vuvalini gang (i.e., the old-lady biker chicks), she might be the most elderly, but that doesn’t stop her from kicking ass and taking names. She obviously still holds out some hope, since she’s saved a bag of seeds to plant one day. What a life she must have lead up to this point.

Mad Max Fury Road

Slit (Josh Helman) is a War Boy whose main job seems to be precariously hanging from the backs and hoods of moving vehicles. But he seems to have the most fun doing it. Those bred in the Citadel live such short, horrible lives, why not enjoy it somehow?

Mad Max Fury Road

The Rock Riders Gang
This gang guards safe passage through the rocks; Furiosa tricks them into thinking she’s bringing them gasoline in return for safe passage. One of the great things about Mad Max: Fury Road is the pageantry of it all. Each gang has a unique look and must spend significant time and energy to achieve the desired effect. This gang had my favorite aesthetic: evil versions of Raggedy Ann and Andy, wearing wigs made out of strips of fabric, rubber, and any other found materials. Not to mention riding their bikes like they are competing in the X-Games. It makes me wonder: Who’s their stylist?

Hopefully, we’ll learn more about them in the two sequels planned for the franchise, as well as comic books that will serve as prequels.

Kennedy Miller Productions/Village Roadshow Pictures

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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