Season 1 | Episode 13 | “Lord of the Bling ” | Aired Feb 8, 2005
Despite the fact that Neptune exists in California, it has not been portrayed as very diversity-friendly throughout the first few episodes of this series. Other than Weevil and his crew (who are shown to be from the “wrong side of the tracks”), the only other main POC we’ve had is Wallace, and his only friend seems to be Veronica. It’s weird because you’d think there’d be lots of diversity in the school, yet there really hasn’t been. This episode feels like the writers realized this and crammed a lot of stereotypes into one episode to make up for it.
It’s interesting that this episode came out 10 years ago, because there’s almost an Empire vibe that makes it relevant to today. Anthony Anderson plays Percy “Bone” Hamilton, and is supposed to come off as threatening rap producer—but I’m forever associating him with his role in Kangaroo Jack, so I’m not buying it. Plus, the fact that whoever did the casting in this episode chose actors to portray his children that are only 12 years younger than he is in real life makes it even more unbelievable. His character is ashamed of his son because he’s super-smart. Okay, it’s one thing if his son wasn’t good at anything at all, but he’s angry because his son does very well in school? What on earth do you want from the poor kid? Then he’s also upset because Yolanda hangs out with the rich kids at school, and therefore has upper-class tastes. I’m not sure at all what this guy wants for children, but it’s pretty obvious that he’s not involved in their lives at all.
Therefore, when his daughter, Yolanda (Jowharah Jones), goes missing, it’s almost like an afterthought. What follows feels like a bumbling plan to try to figure out what happened. Keith is hired by Bone to investigate, but he doesn’t want the police involved at all. Keith talks to Bone’s former lawyer and visits nightclubs to track down Yolanda’s last night, but doesn’t seem to be getting anywhere. He even recruits Veronica to help him track down Dime Bag, a rapper who (to put it nicely) does not get along well with Bone, at a hotel where they bug his room. This still doesn’t lead to any revelations about what happened to Yolanda, though we find out that the rappers think Veronica is scrawny.
Eventually a ransom note shows up, but with highly detailed instructions and a place that allows for no escape, Keith determines that the kidnapper must be really stupid or super-smart. He insists that Bone call in the police, but is told that he uses his own protection instead, and takes Keith off the case. Once at the drop-off spot, Bone is told to place his ring inside a football and send it down the sewer. Veronica and Keith immediately realize who the culprit is, and send in a GPS tracker in a fleet of rubber ducks. Their assumptions were correct: It was Bone’s son, Bryce, who wrote the note to get his father’s attention. Yolanda is safe and ran away to get married to the son of his former lawyer. Bone, unfortunately, cannot bring himself to give them his approval, so she refuses to come home.
The whole incident seems very contrived. I feel the only big revelation out of this whole sequence was that we find out Yolanda had been Veronica’s friend, but she was also the girl Logan had been kissing, which caused Veronica to tell Lilly. This was the trigger that made the couple break up and led to Lilly being alone the night of her murder. What would have happened had Veronica not gone back to get her purse? The flashbacks are more revealing than the actual disappearance, as it shows how Veronica gave in to peer pressure pretty easily.
Far more interesting than the case of the week was the scene with Logan and Aaron as they have to deal with Lynn’s funeral. They realize that they are now alone, with no buffer to try to mend their failed relationship. Even Logan’s sister (whom we have yet to see) won’t come back for the funeral. Instead, she sends a telegram with sympathies because she’s working. When you choose work over your own mother’s funeral, there has got to be some major family dysfunction going on.
Aaron tries to reconcile with Logan, but it’s not going to work. There’s just too much hostility between the two of them to let it disappear overnight. Throughout the funeral reception, Logan is just going through motions, almost to the point of mocking everyone, though they don’t seem to realize it. He stumbles across Aaron’s manager trying to pressure him to sign a deal. This is pretty much the last straw for both Logan and Aaron, as Logan blasts the manager for doing this in the middle of a funeral, and Aaron tells him he’s done with the industry completely.
Later, Duncan walks in on Logan playing video games and tries to get him to come back out. It’s interesting to note that not once does Duncan tell Logan, “I know how you feel,” despite the fact that Duncan is probably the closest friend Logan has who has lost a family member. Instead, Logan shows Duncan a lighter that once belonged to his POW grandfather, engraved with the words “Free at Last.” He tells Duncan that his mother always kept it, but she had left it on her dresser the night she disappeared. Logan sees this as a sign that she’s still alive and this was all planned. He believes this so much that he goes to Veronica and asks her to help him find his mother.
Is Lynn really alive, or is Logan just grasping at straws? Will Wallace keep that hairstyle for the rest of the season? Do you think Veronica is scrawny? So many questions still to be answered!
Until next week, Marshmallows!
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<h1 class="headline heading-content margin-8-top margin-16-bottom">000</h1>
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000
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<p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. Though it doesn’t come close to the delirious energy of the band’s shows, <em>000</em> is a shot of put-your-hands-in-the-air party music. <strong>B</strong></p>
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