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'Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt' fan recap: Get off my beach!

Season 1 | Episode 11 | “Kimmy Rides a Bike!” | Aired Mar 6, 2015

Holy cannoli, do we get a lot of A-list cameos in this episode of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt! It makes the episode feel more like 30 Rock then ever before.

Kimmy Schmidt keeps getting slapped in the face with real-life issues, and she is feeling a wee bit overwhelmed. Lillian is not only a landlord but also a private process server, and serves Kimmy with a subpoena. The trial of Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne (Jon Hamm) is about to start, and Kimmy has been called as a witness. Kimmy feels that she can’t go back to Indiana now—Jacqueline is freaking out over her divorce, Dong wants her to marry him, and Kimmy just wants a normal life. Titus is more concerned that the trial will not be airing on national television and that he has to go to the library to stream the trial online.

Over at the Voorhees’s house, Jacqueline looks wonderful. It seems that Jacqueline has found her bliss, thanks to “Spirit Cycle” and her amazing instructor Tristafe (Nick Kroll). Kimmy decides to attend a Spirit Cycle class with Jacqueline so she can also find her bliss (and avoid the negativity of the trial). While in the class, Kimmy and Jacqueline forget all about their real-life problems, though as soon as the class is over they both start to stress out again. Cyndee keeps calling Kimmy, and Jacqueline’s divorce lawyer won’t leave her alone. The only way for the two to escape is just to continue taking Spirit Cycle classes.


Jacqueline grows jealous because Kimmy moves up from the back row to the front of the class very quickly. It’s not Jacqueline’s fault that she does not have a good imagination and can’t visualize herself on a beach.

Over at the library, Titus gets sucked into the courtroom theatrics of the Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne trial. Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne has decided to represent himself and is able to work the crowd.


The prosecution team, led by Marcia (Tina Fey), are unfortunately equally impressed with the charms of Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne. Titus returns to the apartment to inform Kimmy she has to go be a witness, but she refuses to go to Indiana because she must follow her bliss.


Kimmy returns for another Spirit Cycle class and finds peace on a beach—only to be interrupted by the other Mole Women.

Titus returns to the library just in time to watch Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne take the stand. Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne pleads that he incorrectly predicted the apocalypse 15 years ago because he is bad at math. Though he was wrong about the timing, he could not let the girls go in good conscience. What if the apocalypse did happen? He’s sure the apocalypse is going to happen and we all need to be ready. Titus is freaked out by everything Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne has said and believes that this man is going to walk away without serving jail time. Titus has to convince Kimmy to go to Indiana and give up Spirit Cycle.

Back at the apartment, Titus has a spin-tervention for Kimmy. Spirit Cycle is just like a cult. Kimmy agrees to go to Indiana to testify, and Titus will go with Kimmy for support (but mostly so he can witness the courtroom drama in person). Before Kimmy leaves for Indiana, she heads over to Spirit Cycle to reveal Tristafe for the fraud he is. Jacqueline is just replacing one man that told her what to do with another, and she needs to find out who she really is on her own.

It’s time for a Kimmy and Titus road trip!

Season one of  Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt is now streaming on Netflix.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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