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'The Slap' fan recap: The trial begins

Season 1 | Episode 7 | “Rosie” | Aired Mar 26, 2015

This week, The Slap turns its attention to Rosie, the show’s most divisive figure. I expected an episode from Rosie’s viewpoint to provide her character with some much-needed nuance. Instead, the show doubles down on her crazy.

We begin with a flashback to when Gary and Rosie first met, at one of his art openings. She’s enthralled by his painting of a bear (I suppose this was during his ursine period). They flirt and he takes her to bed, while that loathsome voice-over explains how, after trying her hand at several creative careers, Rosie finally discovered that all she really wanted in life was a good man. Ugh.

Fast-forward to the present, where it is Hugo’s first day of school. He wants to bring his toy spear, and his parents let him because they just have no grasp of their child’s emotional difficulties. After dropping him off, Rosie goes to see Anouk to show off her court outfit: a white hippie muumuu that Anouk (rightfully) says will get laughed right out of the building. The fashion show is cut short, however, when Gary calls: Rosie had better get back to Hugo’s school right away.

Of course, it took the brightest educational minds of New York mere minutes to determine that Hugo shouldn’t be allowed to interact with other children … or other people at all, for that matter. He’s thrown a huge, disruptive tantrum and refuses to cooperate with the teachers. Rosie tries to explain that the slap incident has left her child with PTSD and a profound fear of the world, but they kick him out anyway.

Hugo is completely unperturbed, and on the way home he asks for a lollipop. When Gary says no, Hugo complains that the “funny man” aka Rocco’s dad aka Harry always gives him lollipops, and asks why they don’t see him anymore. Despite this glaring evidence that Hugo isn’t traumatized (he’s just not that great a person), Rosie perseveres in her belief that Harry has maimed her son for life.

Later, Rosie meets with her lawyer, who says that Thanassis has uncovered some evidence against her: when Hugo was just 7 months old, Rosie left him alone in her apartment and drove to Montauk, hours away. Rosie doesn’t refute the police report. Instead, she confides that she had postpartum depression. This is one of the few moments in which it’s possible to feel sympathy for her, and Melissa George sells it well.

But the moment quickly passes, once Rosie leaves the DA and goes directly to Hector, who’s in the middle of an important business meeting at a restaurant. She barges in and accuses him of leaking her secret (the postpartum depression) to Thanassis. Hector denies it, and is hurt by her allegation. Not done with her mission to destroy every friendship she has, Rosie next goes to Richie’s apartment. She pleads with her son’s teenage babysitter, but Richie stands firm: he will not give her the photos from the barbecue. Rosie keeps insisting, but Richie says he can’t be responsible for sending anyone to prison.

Finally, out of options and knowing that, without the pictures, she’s going to lose the case, Rosie makes a serious blunder: she meets Harry at his dealership, and asks him to plead no contest. He’ll have a record but no jail time, and this will all be over. Harry refuses, saying that he needs to go to court to clear his name. Of course, as soon as she leaves he calls Thanassis, who asks the judge for an immediate dismissal.

Gary comes home to their apartment, incensed. He’s heard what Rosie did, and he’s not happy. They have a huge fight, during which Rosie screams that Gary is too lazy to fight for his own child, and Gary counters that she’s a fraud.

Gary storms out and heads to yet another art show, where he impresses a beguiling young student with a nihilistic diatribe on the pointlessness of painting (or of trying at anything, really). In the next scene, they’re back at her place, and she’s taking off her clothes. (Of course she is, because the only way The Slap knows how to demonstrate marital troubles is infidelity.)

Thanassis’ motion to dismiss the trial isn’t approved, so the next day everyone shows up at court—including Gary, who, after last night’s tryst, is reaffirmed in his love for his family and his commitment to his marriage. First, Aisha testifies on behalf of the prosecution. Then Rosie takes the stand. (Apparently Anouk’s fashion tips fell on deaf ears, because Rosie has come to court dressed in her best French milkmaid getup, including a virginal short-sleeved white dress and, I kid you not, flowers braided into her hair.)

The Slap recap Rosie episode 7. Virginia Sherwood/NBC.

Rosie gives her spiel about how Hugo has been psychologically damaged, and how being slapped has taught him that evil and cruelty exist in the world. She breaks down crying. Harry knows that her emotional speech could get him convicted, so when Thanassis asks if he has his client’s permission to go after Rosie personally, Harry tells him to do whatever it takes.

Thanassis comes back at Rosie with a vengeance. He brings up Gary’s (likely, but unverified) alcoholism, and suggests that Hugo actually is emotionally damaged—but because of his home life, where he’s surrounded by drunks, not because of Harry. He makes Rosie recount how many drinks she and Gary both had at the party, as well as the fact that she breastfed Hugo while alcohol was still in her system. He caps off his scathing cross-examination by bringing up Rosie’s short abandonment of Hugo when he was a baby.

The whole courtroom, including Harry and his supporters, seems shocked at just how nasty a turn the proceedings have taken. Gary’s finally mad enough to take action, and tells his lawyer he has something that will fix all this. The lawyer requests a few days’ break so she can submit new evidence.

The final shot shows Richie, alone in his bedroom, deleting the photos from the barbecue. If that’s the evidence Gary’s talking about, he may be out of luck.

The Slap series finale will air next Thursday at 10/9C on NBC.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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