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'One Big Happy' fan react: Kryptonite in the closet

Season 1 | Episode 2 | “Out of the Closet” | Aired Mar 24, 2015

When we open on the second episode of One Big Happy, several weeks have passed since Prudence was saved from being deported by her hasty nuptials to Lizzy’s baby daddy, Luke.

Much to Lizzy’s horror, the Brit bride has shipped all of her stuff from home, which means Lizzy has to share that closet. No, not the one she came out of, but the one where she’s been storing her ex-girlfriend Erica’s things for the last three years.

Despite the advice of Luke, her sister, and every therapist she’s ever fired, Lizzy has been unable to let go of the “Lucifer of lesbians.”

Luke is thrilled to finally see his best friend pitching Erica’s belongings and can’t wait to set them all on fire, but Prudence thinks Lizzy should return everything to her ex for closure.

Bad idea! Erica—a snide, sexy Brooke Lyons—is Lizzy’s kryptonite, “if kryptonite had perky B-cups,” and always knows how to lure her back in.

Despite knowing this, Lizzy ignores Luke’s warning and meets Erica, where she is predictably sucked in, hickey and all. Yup, that wily Erica knows how to pull Lizzy’s strings almost as well as Prudence does with her “little wooden babies,” Dr. Charlie and Miroslova.

Who’s that screaming? No, it’s not 1D fans hollering over Zayn’s departure. It’s Luke. The one thing that freaks him out the most is marionettes, and to Lizzy’s utter delight, Prudence unpacks two of the most heinous puppets you’ve ever seen. Even worse, she insists on hanging them over their bed. Despite Luke’s best effort to follow Marcus’ advice and man up, he ends up sleeping on Lizzy’s floor in the fetal position.

After Lizzy’s ditched for dinner, she sets fire to Erica’s stuff and says goodbye to her ex with the help of a few “mouth kisses” from Prudence posing as her new girlfriend.

The episode ends when Luke finally snaps and admits to his pupaphobia, taking all of Lizzy’s fun away but rewarding viewers by never having to see those monstrosities again.

“Out of the Closet” is a vast improvement over the pilot’s info dump. The writers could’ve rehashed the setup and kept the focus on the dysfunction of their new family structure, but instead they rightfully focused on the characters.

Not only did we get greater insight into Lizzy—in all her uptight, controlling, heartfelt hilarity—but we experienced the fun, easy camaraderie between besties Luke and Lizzy. Her devilish delight when Luke has to deal with the puppet “issue” is so infectious you want to join in on his torture.

(Actors Elisha Cuthbert and Nick Zano have such a convincing rhythm and familiarity between them, you can’t help but believe they’ve been BFFs for years.)

Add to that Prudence’s desire to fit in by giving Lizzy advice and then being remorseful when she realizes, of course, best friend Luke knows best. But she can still have Lizzy’s back—or mouth, as it were—and you’ve got a new-generation Three’s Company that shows great promise.

Where the episode lacked in sharp one-liners it gained in smart delivery. Balance the two out more and One Big Happy will be “veryverygood.”

Worth Repeating:

Luke: Prudence made you bangers and mash, which is food and not a cop show on USA as I originally thought.

Luke: Calm down, Anal Annie.

Lizzy: These boxes aren’t even labeled. Don’t they have Sharpies where you come from in Candy Land or Hogwarts?

Prudence: This cock has been in my family for over 100 years. I need to find a special place to stick it.

Prudence: Is that closet special? Is it the one you came out of?

One Big Happy airs Tuesdays at 9:30/8:30C on NBC.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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