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'The Musketeers' fan recap: It's a family affair

Season 2 | Episode 8 | “The Prodigal Father” | Aired March 7, 2015

Two episodes away from the season finale of The Musketeers and so many storylines to cram in! It’s time for Porthos to finally meet with his father. He reaches the estate and is immediately greeted by the sight of girls running toward him, but it’s not because Porthos has decided to bring along Aramis. Instead, they seem to want to run away from the place. It doesn’t seem like this is going to be a happy reunion.

Once inside, Porthos approaches the man claiming to be his father, the Marquis of Belgard (Liam Cunningham), who confirms everything. He introduces Porthos to his daughter, Eleanor (Emma Hamilton), and her husband, Levesque (Steven Cree), who are not happy that Porthos is there because they think he just wants money. Belgard shows no regard toward his daughter and her husband, and even encourages Porthos to fight Levesque after being challenged. Porthos takes out Levesque easily, and the animosity between them grows.

Belgard tells Porthos that he had legitimately married Porthos’ mother and that he is the legal heir to his estate. He gives Porthos a picture of his mother, whom Belgrad says was the love of his life. However, he says that Treville and De Foix hated his mother out of jealousy and kidnapped the two of them, threatening to kill Porthos if his mother ever tried to find Belgard again. They dumped them off at the Court of Miracles and told Belgard they were dead, and it was only because of guilt that Treville found Porthos again and helped him to be a musketeer. Porthos isn’t sure what to believe, as he now doubts whether he rose so high in the Musketeers from his own merit or if it was helped along by Treville’s guilt.

The rest of the Musketeers look into why those girls were running away and discover that Eleanor and Levesque are pimping out young girls. Disgusted by this, they break up a party where the pair is selling off girls to the highest bidder and save them. Belgard truly had no idea that his daughter and son-in-law were doing this, but this does not make him the good guy here. Treville finally reveals that Belgard was the one who wanted Porthos and his mother out and threatened to kill them, but it was Treville and Du Foix who snuck and hid them. Even though Treville did go back and find him, everything Porthos has done in the Musketeers has been of his own merit. He realizes that his father is not being truthful because the “picture of his mother” is not of her. Belgard probably just picked it at market, thinking Porthos couldn’t tell apart one black woman from another. Despite the fact that Porthos is the legitimate heir to his father’s fortune and estate, he’s going to walk away from it. He never knew about it and he’s never wanted it, so doing this isn’t going to hurt him as much. He does make it a point to tell Athos that he has the bigger estate, though.

Now that Constance’s husband has died, she has to go through the mourning process. Despite the fact that they didn’t love each other, he had (for the most part) treated her well. She feels guilt because she had cheated on him and caused the circumstances that led to his death. D’Artagnan, on the other hand, thinks that she should stop the mourning process for those very reasons. He gets angry at her again because she asks him to give her some time. This once again shows D’Artagnan’s immaturity and how he’s not really thinking about what it’s like for Constance. He seems to think that just because they love each other, everything will work out. She’s the more practical and mature person in this relationship, when her request just for time (so it doesn’t look suspicious to the world) gets him upset.

This makes the doctor’s proposal seem more enticing because he’s more mature, respects Constance, and even offers her more time. Granted, this seems to have come out of the blue because he’s never shown any real affection to her before—though in his defense, it was because she was married. Apologies to all the Constagnan fans out there, but a relationship with the doctor could have been very interesting. It would have allowed Constance to see if D’Artagnan knows how to win her over properly. Plus, even though she has the Queen’s approval, it would have been nice to let Constance at the very least be completely free from a man for a while. She’s a very independent woman, and based on what she’s said, it’s been a while since she’s has the freedom to just be herself. Instead, Constance finally declares that she’s ready to be public about her love to D’Artagnan. His mature response? “Shut up and kiss me.” Here’s hoping that Constance knows what she is getting into.

This episode seems to be a very run-of-the-mill episode until the last five minutes. Rochefort has barely been shown in the episode other than to make sure the King is isolated, then appears later, when Milady tells him she knows about his involvement with the fake princess. The Queen is alone in her room and fueled with suspicion about her relationship with Aramis. Rochefort basically goes crazy-pants at this point. He’s been creepy all season, but tonight, he lets it all come out. He starts by asking about the necklace, which she dismisses: She was 14 when he gave it to her, and she’s had a lot of jewelry since then. This is the trigger for Rochefort, as he starts attacking her. He throws her on the ground, declaring that they need to consummate their love, and that no one will hear her because all of her servants answer to him. Anne puts up a good fight, but honestly, it’s a pretty scary moment because it’s obvious Rochefort is not in a right state of mind here. Thankfully, Constance comes running, and her entrance distracts Rochefort enough that Anne is able use her hairpiece to slash him in the eye, kind of like this:

Queen slashes Rochefort in eye

Rochefort still has the audacity to threaten Anne about Aramis as he runs out in pain. It’s so mind-boggling that he thinks he’s going to get away with trying to rape the Queen of France and she’s going to be one who will be found at fault.

Next week is going to be intense!

The Musketeers airs on Saturdays 9/8C on BBC America.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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