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'Ground Floor' recap: This morning, I had a rusty shower

Season 2 | Episode 3 | “Space Invader” | Aired Dec 23, 2014

Tonight’s Ground Floor opens with a slumber party! And by that I mean Brody is staying over at Jenny’s crappy apartment. Clues that it’s crappy: There’s rust in the water, the mattress is lumpy, and her next-door neighbor, Ray, can hear every word they say—and replies as though he’s in the room (::cough cough:: Office Space).

At the office the next morning, Threepeat is jealous of Brody’s new laid-back lifestyle. He’s wearing casual clothes, he leaves work at a reasonable hour, and best of all, he gets to have his bell rung on a regular basis. As a hardworking man, Threepeat is practically celibate. So wait, how did Don Draper manage all that tail?

Brody makes his obligatory weekly attempt at reconciliation with Mansfield, and brings him a peace offering: He’s discovered an important document that was accidentally shredded. Mansfield shreds it again out of spite, and calls Brody out on his attempt to win his heart back. Then he says, “Good day!” just like Willy Wonka, because that will never, ever get old. As soon as Brody leaves, Mansfield tasks Lindsay with piecing the document back together.

Back on the ground floor, Brody’s first paycheck arrives, and he’s shocked by how small it is. I feel like a finance guy maybe would have found out what his salary was before working a job for two weeks, but what do I know? I’m not a finance guy. Harvard challenges Brody to a bet: Whoever has the most money left over from their meager paychecks at the end of the week wins. It’s on!

Threepeat asks Jenny to set him up with a girl, and Mansfield attempts to take Lindsay under his wing and make her the new Brody. Yawn. Moving on.

Jenny comes home to find Brody working on his new budget. He’s figured out a way to save a lot of money: He gave up his apartment! He’s going to crash at Jenny’s place! Without consulting her! What could go wrong? Jenny does that neurotic “Nothing’s wrong!” thing while obviously freaking out, because sitcom women, am I right?

At the office the next morning, Jenny is venting to her new BFF Lindsay about her current living situation. Mansfield overhears what Brody has done, and tries really hard not to care. Spoiler alert: He totally cares, you guys.

Meanwhile, Brody tells Threepeat about his new arrangement, and Threepeat is shocked. Moving in unannounced isn’t like Brody; he’s a romantic. Threepeat advises Brody to make a bigger deal about it, because of course he does.

That night, at the bar, Threepeat again asks Jenny for help getting a girl. She flirts with him to up his curb appeal, then sends him off to seal the deal. Brody approaches Jenny and apologizes for “crashing” at her place. He wants to live together! Like, forever! Hell, they’ve been together six whole months! Jenny, predictably, bails.

The next morning, we learn that Jenny’s advice was spot-on, whereas Threepeat’s was terrible. Shocker. Brody shows up in Mansfield’s office to water the plants (oh, right, he’s the plant lady now!) just as Lindsay arrives with the freshly reconfigured document. Mansfield sits Lindsay down and delivers a conquistador metaphor (is there any other kind?) that, strangely, is perfectly apropos to Brody and Jenny’s current situation. What are the odds?

At home, Jenny apologizes to Brody for freaking out over his moving in, and Brody apologizes for moving in at all. The two agree that Brody is “moving out,” which means he’s going to pay for a second apartment while still spending four to five nights a week at Jenny’s. Man, these silly millennials and their fear of commitment. What are we going to do with them, huh? ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Wait—don’t leave yet! There’s still the matter of the bet. Let’s see, Brody just got a new apartment this week, so he probably lost, right? Nope, Harvard did, by a dollar, because he spent his money on candy. Classic Harvard. As the loser, he must visit the top floor in the nude, because workplace sexual harassment is absolutely not a thing on television shows. Whee! See you next week!

Ground Floor airs Tuesdays at 10/9C on TBS.