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'Elementary' recap: Sherlock in the sky with diamonds

Season 3 | Episode 5 | “Rip Off” | Aired Nov 27, 2014

Sherlock wrestles with a bodybuilder and uncovers a diamond-smuggling ring while Watson is MIA in Denmark on this week’s Elementary.

The title of the episode is “Rip Off,” ostensibly because the murder victim has his left hand forcibly pulled from his body. But I can’t help wondering if the show’s writers are winking at naysayers who see Elementary as an Americanized copy of the BBC’s Sherlock. If you’d Googled “Elementary rip off” before today, you’d have seen a lot of unflattering hits comparing the two shows. The critics may still be out there, but this episode should at least change the Google algorithm.

Or perhaps “Rip Off” refers to Watson’s discarded memoir, which sets Sherlock on edge when he discovers that his former partner had been secretly documenting their work together and, particularly, Holmes’ methods of deduction.

Even if the memoir isn’t the titular ripoff, it’s enough to make Holmes present his new partner, Kitty, with a nondisclosure agreement. He does this while she’s conducting an experiment with Clyde the turtle, who requests food by administering electric shocks to Kitty.

It’s tough being a turtle from a broken home, and Holmes and Watson’s separation is clearly taking a toll on Clyde.

“It’s only a small sample but there’s mounting evidence that he wishes you harm,” Holmes tells Kitty. “Until Watson returns from Copenhagen, Clyde will either warm to you or the electrocutions will continue.”

elementary animated GIF

But they can’t sit around feeding turtles all day. A severed hand is found in the gutter, and Holmes and Winters are on the case. The hand, it turns out, belongs to Moshi Shapiro, a mailbox-store owner/black-market diamond smuggler. He was killed and stuffed under an illegally parked car that was later towed away.

Holmes first assumes that Mr. Shapiro’s hand was cut off by a street sweeper. But when a discarded briefcase containing diamonds is found chained to a pair of handcuffs with “considerable blood and viscera” on them (gross), he deduces that the hand was severed manually—a feat “just within the range of human potential.”

It seems a little convenient that Holmes and Winters (that just doesn’t sound right) find their man by stepping into a nearby gym, but I’m willing to let it slide since I now know the rules of British arm wrestling. Evidently it involves pulling your opponent’s arm toward you rather than pushing it to the side, which is how Holmes is able to trick a particularly braggadocious man into providing the police with a DNA sample.

Holmes lets go mid-wrestle, the man hits himself in the face, and then he wipes his bloody nose with a gym towel. Game, set, match.

He confesses that he was paid to kill Shapiro but says there were three other targets, including Shapiro’s employee Anit. The evidence points to a South African diamond smuggler, but Holmes isn’t convinced. Kitty suggests the killer could be Anit, which is confirmed when they discover that the weight lifter’s payment was sent via the same packaging materials for sale at the mailbox store.

During all of this, Captain Gregson is dealing with some drama of his own. He finds out that his daughter, Hannah (Liza Bennett), was abused by her boyfriend and police partner, so Gregson promptly punches the fool in the face.

He’s looking at interdepartmental issues if he doesn’t make nice, and Hannah is worried about how the department will see her if the truth comes out. After a heart-to-heart with Kitty, who shares her own frustrations about being seen as a victim, Gregson relents and offers what amounts to a public apology in the NYPD (aka a handshake).

But it turns out Kitty has done a little work on the side, convincing Hannah’s partner to quit the force and get out of both Hannah and Gregson’s lives. We don’t learn what she said to him, but it was evidently quite effective.

In the end, Sherlock and Kitty go back to the brownstone, where Holmes tears up (or rips?) the nondisclosure agreement. She has the right to tell her own stories, Holmes says, and should feel free to write about their work if she so desires.

“If you do write a book,” Holmes says, “someone might be interested to read it.”

Stray notes

  • Interesting that The Casebook of Sherlock Holmes made another appearance. I had honestly forgotten all about it since that brief scene in season 2. I’m sure this will be a topic when Holmes gets back from her “sexcapade” (Holmes’ words, not mine).
  • I lived in New York in 2011, and if I had seen a human hand in a puddle, I probably would have just kept on walking.
  • I really want to try British arm wrestling now.

Elementary airs Thursdays at 10/9C on CBS.

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The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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aria-label="Posts by Elisabeth Vincentelli" class="author url fn" rel="author">Elisabeth Vincentelli</a></p><p class="article-header__timestamp">Posted on <time datetime="2000-04-14T04:00:00+00:00">April 14, 2000 at 4:00am EDT</time></p> <div class="article-header__share"> <div class="sharedaddy sd-sharing-enabled"><div class="robots-nocontent sd-block sd-social sd-social-icon-text sd-sharing"><div class="sd-content"><ul><li class="share-facebook"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-facebook-588800" class="share-facebook sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=facebook" target="_blank" title="Share"><span>Share</span></a></li><li class="share-twitter"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="sharing-twitter-588800" class="share-twitter sd-button share-icon" href="http://ew.com/article/2000/04/14/000/?share=twitter" target="_blank" title="Tweet"><span>Tweet</span></a></li><li class="share-email"><a rel="nofollow" data-shared="" class="share-email sd-button 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<div class="article-body"> <div class="article__letter-grade"><span class="article__letter-grade-shape channel__color--background-color"></span><p aria-label="Letter grade">We gave it a <strong>B</strong></p></div> <div class="article-body__inner"> <div class="triangle-anchor"></div><p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. Though it doesn’t come close to the delirious energy of the band’s shows, <em>000</em> is a shot of put-your-hands-in-the-air party music. <strong>B</strong></p> </div> <div class="article-body__show-full"> <button id="button--show-full" class="channel__color--background-color" type="button">Show Full Article</button> </div> </div> <!-- template: article-footer --> <footer class="article-footer"> <div class="articles-recirculation articles-recirculation--see-also channel__color--border-color"> <!-- template: article-footer-section-title --> <h2 class="article-footer__section-title channel__color--border-color article-footer__section-title--third-party"> <div class="article-footer__section-title-inner-wrap"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-span"> <span class="article-footer__section-title-more article-footer__section-title-more--" data-mobile-title=""> sponsored stories </span> </span> </div> </h2> <div class="ob-widget-wrapper " data-url-fragment="outbrain"> <div 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