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'About a Boy' recap: The return of Will 1.0

Season 2 | Episode 5 | “About an Angry Ex” | Aired Nov 18, 2014

Remember how sad it was when Will and Dr. Sam broke up on About a Boy? For a while Will had turned into an honest, respectable man, and it was a little bit distressing to imagine him going back to being the despicable playboy, wasn’t it? Yeah, never mind. Will 1.0 is back, y’all, and I, for one, say “Welcome!”

Let’s break down his plunge—as well as Marcus’s quest for forbidden love—as we tackle the latest hilarious episode.

Marcus is excitedly outlining his detailed “top-secret mission” to win resident high school bad girl Shea’s affection, despite Fiona forbidding him to see her.

Will: Is Shea showing any indication that she likes you back?
Marcus: I am up to my beanie in indication!

“Indication” to Marcus means a few texts and a copped feel, of course.

Marcus: I got shoulder! I mean, it was over the jacket, but …

Will’s all for it, even though his inner “ambiguous paternal figure” thinks Shea is bad news. (Will 1.0.)

A sexy woman knocks on Will’s door, and after flirting heavily with her (Will 1.0), he becomes furious when she serves him with a summons. Seems one Anastasia Campbell is suing him, claiming she co-wrote “Runaway Sleigh,” which as we know is Will’s bread-and-butter. Will calls in the big guns (and by “big guns” I mean his best friend, Andy), who tells him to get a lawyer. Will can’t use his old lawyer because he slept with her (Will 1.0), so Andy suggests his wife, Laurie. “Perfect! I wouldn’t sleep with Laurie if she were the last female on a scorched planet Earth!” Will shouts. (Will 1.0 and 2.0.)

After discovering Anastasia teaches Pilates (thank you, Google), Will and Andy scope out the studio. Will instantly recognizes Anastasia as “Stalker Stacy” (Aimee Garcia)—by her butt. (Will 1.0.) Quickly running to Fiona for help, Will discovers her doing some doula research by watching a video of a woman in the Amazon giving birth.

Will: Will you stop for a second with the rain forest porn?
Fiona: It’s natural! That is a vagina!
Will: THAT IS NOT WHAT VAGINAS ARE FOR!!

Will asks for Fiona’s advice (“I’m hoping your crazy can shed some light on Stacy’s crazy”) and is furious to realize that when he was living in New York with Sam (Will 2.0), Fiona had an encounter with Stacy that might have been the catalyst for the lawsuit. Seems that when Stacy showed up on Will’s doorstep, Fiona spilled the beans about Will living in New York with his serious girlfriend. Stacy became inconsolable, so Fiona told her that she didn’t need Will and that she deserved “much, much more.”

Will makes Fiona go to the Pilates studio where Stacy instantly recognizes her. Hey, you don’t forget crazy, I guess. She tells Fiona that it’s because of her that she’s been focusing on what she really deserved: money. Uh-oh. When Fiona tries to backtrack and tell her that she meant emotionally, not financially, Stacy realizes that it was Will who sent her there. After threatening to punish Fiona on the Pilates machine, Stacy breaks down and convinces Fiona that Will is a monster.

While in a hilarious meeting with lawyer Laurie (who it’s nice to see in her element of cutting down Will while in a different element of her law office), Will admits that he had a “roughly eight-night-stand” with Stacy back when he wrote “Runaway Sleigh.” Laurie discovers Stacy is looking for back royalties and advises Will not to contact her. As if.

Will: That’s not fair!
Laurie: You think our legal system is fair? You’re lucky you have good hair. You are the dumbest individual.

Man, she’s so right. He has such good hair.

Meanwhile, Marcus is having problems of his own. He’s on an unsuccessful mission to get Shea to notice him: bringing her a cup of water while she runs the track in P.E., showing up with a Bic lighter and a gas mask to light her cigarette (see main photo), and offering a vending machine’s worth of gum from the inside of his jacket since she’d earlier told him her breath was “ass.” Sweet-talker. You can see why he’s whipped. Shea tells him to stop being a “creepy little stalker,” which drives him to Will’s counseling couch, where he admits he feels like an idiot. I mean, it’s hard when someone makes you feel like a monster. Will 2.0 agrees, and hightails it to the Pilates studio to do some serious butt-kissing. Hey, it’s a nice butt.

Stacy—or, Anastasia, as she’ll be known as again in this paragraph for reasons that many of you will get and few of you will not (don’t sweat it)—isn’t interested in talking about dropping the lawsuit, and punishes Will on a Pilates machine fit for Christian Grey’s Red Room of Pain. Will yelps out that he’s sorry and admits he was a selfish jerk back then. He’s not that guy anymore!

Stacy: But you’re still that guy in the one way it counts, right?
Will: Hell, yeah!

(Will. 1.0.)

Over at the high school, Marcus and Shea make up. She tells him that if he’ll be a little bit cooler, she’ll hang out with him. Marcus promises to formulate a strategy and put together a focus group. Um, can I be in that focus group? I say, STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM HER, YOU SWEET BOY!

Later, Will interrupts Fiona (who is Laurie’s doula), Andy, and Laurie by telling them that he took Fiona’s advice and he’s sure Stacy will drop the lawsuit. “I apologized to her several times last night. And now I’m going to apologize to her again.” He wants to know if he should buy a boat or a motorcycle with all his newfound moola.

(Say it with me now: “Will 1.0.”)

As Stacy leaves, she thanks Will 1.0 for the great time, yet promises she will not be dropping the lawsuit.

Player—played.

Favorite Fiona-ism:

Stacy: You literally changed the course of my life! You are such a wise woman!
Fiona: Oh, that’s really kind of you. Really, I’m just a conduit for the wisdom of others.

About a Boy airs Tuesdays at 9:30/8:30C on NBC.