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'Happyland' recap: Guilty as charged

Season 1 | Episode 5 | “Repeated Infractions” | Aired Oct 28, 2014

This week is all about new beginnings, and we pick up with Elena preparing for her tour guide graduation and Lucy trying to look less trampy for her first date with Noah. Of course, Lucy and Noah see Harper and Ian at the restaurant, and—weirdly—they join them. Lucy slides in next to Ian (again, weirdly), and things get even more awkward when Noah asks first about their love scenes and then about Lucy’s parents working at the park. Lucy dashes off to avoid further questions, and Ian follows. Neither of their dates seem to think it’s strange that they are huddled up by the bar whispering with their heads together. Worst. Date. Ever.

During their huddle, Ian seems angry that Lucy is broadcasting her “love child” status, and they both worry that she might have told Noah more than she remembers. They agree to dial down the awkwardness, and then also decide to join Harper and Noah on the Ricky 360, a drunk-tour of the park that apparently ends with folks not wearing pants.

Once they get to the Ricky 360, Harper and Lucy have a heart-to-heart about all the weirdness between them, and they are best friends again. Noah, who spends the entirety of the night grinning from ear to ear, is no match for Ian, however, and Harper gets into a full-on snit when someone else at the party tells her he saw Lucy and Ian making out in the park. Now they aren’t best friends anymore.

Harper confronts Lucy about Ian, and Lucy is surprised, to say the least, and uses the “it just happened”Screen Shot 2014-10-28 at 1.35.01 PM excuse. Harper isn’t buying it and presses Lucy about her feelings. She asks the question that we all want the real answer to: “Are you into him or what?” When Ian walks up, she makes some snarky comment just before a dramatic hair flip and her now famous storm-off.

Meanwhile, Will answers Theodore’s call to the park so that Will can dispose of the body of an old guy who’s taken a “happy nap.” The hijinks that ensue are so completely unbelievable that I feel a little insulted that Happyland is asking me to buy into this bit, much less to laugh at it. When Theodore and Will try to sneak the corpse out in a wheelchair, Weekend at Bernie’sScreen Shot 2014-10-28 at 1.35.24 PMstyle, all the suspension of disbelief in the world isn’t enough to get me on board. I’m shaking my fist (and my head) at this nonsense.

While the kiddos are underage drinking and hiding bodies, Elena finds out she’s passed the tour guide test. She decides to celebrate with some age-inappropriate mean girls that don’t even try to hide their eye rolls, and they set off to the park. When she learns they are both only 22 and headed for grad school in the fall, she feels self-conscious at being the oldest one at the party.

Elena tries to show off for the other girls, since her way with men is the only edge she has over these girls (or Screen Shot 2014-10-28 at 1.35.57 PMso she thinks anyway), and things turn humiliating when she accidentally hits on Ian. Elena’s face is priceless as she realizes she’s rubbing on her daughter’s love interest/brother. It gets even worse when he calls her Mrs. Velez. But instead of just leaving well enough alone, she scolds him about the underage drinking, and he further embarrasses her by mentioning her teenage daughter in front of her new friends.

Screen Shot 2014-10-28 at 1.34.13 PMWhen Lucy finally turns her attention back to Noah, she’s still pretty distracted with all her friend drama, and Noah declines her invitation to make a terrible decision. It’s a good thing he didn’t want any part of stealing Ricky, because Harper and Lucy wind up in Happyland jail. Will’s new security job has perks, and he bails them out. Harper, even though she’s my least-favorite character, has a point: every guy she sets her sights on likes Lucy, and this makes Harper break up with Lucy (again) while they’re in fake jail.

The gentle nudge that comes from Elena’s existential crisis prompts Lucy to talk to Harper, and she confessesScreen Shot 2014-10-28 at 1.34.28 PM her big secret. This is all Harper needs to not feel so proprietary about Ian. Harper sympathizes with the bizarro nature of their connection and now they truly are BFFs AAF (again).

Back in costume, Ian and Lucy are acting more like brother and sister than ever before, and frankly I don’t care for it. I like them so much better when they had all that electric sexual chemistry. Lucy takes Ian’s brotherly advice and goes to visit Noah to try to make up with him. OF course he agrees, and Lucy is charmed by Screen Shot 2014-10-28 at 1.38.30 PMhis boringness. I, on the other hand, am not.

I’m taking bets: How long until Lucy and Ian find out that they are NOT in fact, brother and sister? You think they’ll make us wait until the finale?

Happyland airs Tuesdays at 11/10C on MTV.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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