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It's a droid-a-palooza on 'Star Wars Rebels'

Season 1 | Episode 3 | “Droids in Distress” | Aired Oct 13, 2014

Whether you’re in the Star Wars universe or flying a Firefly-class spaceship in a space western, one thing holds true when it comes to ragtag crews looking to stay on the edge of the Big Bad’s radar: You need work to keep your ship flying, and you can’t always be too picky about what sort of job you take. Vizago has got a job. The crew of the Ghost are taking it.

They board a shuttle, pretending not to know one another. Other shuttle passengers include Imperial Minister Tua and an Aqualish, who are having communication issues. They need a translator.

r2 and threepio

Oh, hi, R2 and C-3PO! That’s convenient. Well, they did need work after their old master went to the Dark Side.

However, much as I’m happy to see Threepio and R2, the best thing about this shuttle is the driver. Star Tours fans will recognize him as one of the RX droids that crashes flies the Starspeeder 3000. Let’s hope RX-24 (Paul Reubens) is a better pilot, because we’re taking off.

Not long into the flight, Chopper starts acting up, and Kanan reminds everyone of the “no droids in the passenger area” rule.

Ezra just called Threepio an astromech. Threepio is appalled. Appalled, I tell you! The fact that R2 is chattering on about some secret mission is just more appalling!

Who will translate for Minister Tua now? Zeb helpfully suggests that Sabine can speak Aqualish. Sabine tells Tua that the shipment is at Bay 17. Once they land, Tua is off to Bay 17 and Ezra is headed to Bay 7. Sabine needs to work on her pronunciation, I guess.

sabine can help

While Ezra reminds Kanan that he wants to learn the Jedi stuff, he gets the bay open and lets the rest of the crew in, including Hera and the Ghost.

Once they see the cargo, Zeb looks visibly freaked and everyone’s uneasy. The crates contain T7 disruptors. Why does an imperial minister want banned weapons?

Whatever the reason, she’s just found Bay 17 empty and she wants her guns. Threepio has, oh so helpfully, translated that it’s Bay 7, so Tua is on her way with her Stormtrooper escort.

There are days I just want to disassemble him.

The crew moves fast, but not fast enough, and is confronted by Tua and the troopers. When Zeb puts his hands up, it looks like he’s going to comply, but his casual surrender turns into a “not so much,” and he starts beating the crap out of them. I’m highly amused watching this because Steve Blum is voicing Zeb and the head trooper. In essence, he’s beating himself up.

zeb fight

Still, this is more than just a normal Zeb brawl. He’s creating a distraction so the rest of the crew can get away with the crates, but he’s growling things like “never again” and “not this time.” Soon, the bad guys are down and the good guys are boarding the Ghost.

C-3PO and R2 are also boarding the Ghost. Threepio thinks they’re safe from the brigands who attacked Minister Tua—until they’re airborne and they discover they’re with those brigands. Yay, brigands!

Kanan wants to deliver the shipment, but Zeb is not really good with that plan and thinks they should take those disruptors out of circulation. Sabine overhears plans for those disruptors to be used as prototypes for new Empire weapons. Kanan is not budging. They need credits; Vizago has them. Whatever they do, they’d better do it fast. Minister Tua has reported to Agent Kallus about the attack.

Back on the Ghost, Hera explains Zeb’s dark mood to Ezra. The Empire used T7 disruptors when they took over Zeb’s home world. Only a few Lasat remain. No wonder he beat everyone up.

We have a new wrinkle. R2 says his secret mission is to make sure the crates didn’t get into Empire hands, and that his master will pay handsomely for them.  Whatever the mission is, Threepio isn’t in on it. He’s too busy making an emergency distress call to the Empire to tell them he’s been abducted.

Dis-as-sembled.

The Empire arrives and interrupts the meeting with Vizago, who then takes off and saves his own mercenary butt. That leaves our heroes and R2 to take on Kallus and the Empire. Luckily, Sabine and R2 have figured out how to use the T7 disruptors against the Empire and destroy them at the same time. Sabine rigs them to blow.

When Kallus draws his weapon, Zeb realizes that it’s a Lasat Bo-Rifle. Kallus reveals that not only was he there for the slaughter on Lasan, but he gave the order. A pretty epic battle ensues and Zeb fights with all his heart, but Kallus disarms him.

surrender zeb

Suddenly, Ezra yells “NO!” and Kallus goes flying as he’s strongly Force-pushed out of the way.

In the end, Zeb is safe, the Empire doesn’t get the weapons, and Ezra starts formal Jedi training tomorrow.

But what about R2’s secret mission? The crew of the Ghost return him to his master and get paid, although they don’t get his name. Senator Bail Organa has his droids back and, thanks to R2, recordings of these … Rebels.

bail

 

Star Wars Rebels airs Mondays at 9/8C on Disney XD.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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