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'Hawaii Five-0' recap: Bad to the drone

Season 5 | Episode 501 | “A’ohe kahi e pe’e ai” | Aired Sept 26, 2014

What a premiere! The first episode of Hawaii Five-0’s fifth season was full of McDanno banter, hacked military drones, and a surprising amount of subplots/storylines for our main characters. So let’s get started!

As usual, we open on a beautiful beach. But this time, the beach is abandoned, and so is everything else. Restaurants are empty, and cars litter the roads. The chill Hawaiian music really helps add to the dystopian mood.

McDanno Therapy 2But first, let’s flash back to seven hours earlier, when Steve McGarrett (Alex O’Loughlin) and Danny Williams (Scott Caan) are sitting in couples therapy mandated psychological reviews. But really: They are discussing how long they’ve been together (down to the day) and answering important questions like, “Why does Steve always have to drive?” and “Why does Steve call Danny ‘Danno’?” We also flash back to the pilot and see how our team was assembled, including the most recent addition, Lou Grover (Chi McBride). But their therapist does get Steve and Danny to agree on one thing: Their team is ohana.

[Author’s note: The biggest struggle I will having doing these recaps will be controlling my inner shipper. I will try my hardest to be objective, but I will not always succeed.]

Kono Kalakaua (Grace Park) is surfing with her boyfriend, Adam Noshimuri (Ian Anthony Dale), and they’ve recently been talking about something serious. Adam wants to know if she’s thought about it. But mysterious relationship questions will have to wait, because Kono is called to a case!

The team arrives at the crime scene, where a couple was killed by military-issue bullets. Luckily, the male victim’s phone recorded their murder. The “shooter” is a combat drone. But someone has to be controlling it.

And who is the best person to consult about mysterious, unauthorized military drones? Why, the resident conspiracy theorist, of course! Steve and Danny meet up with Jerry Ortega (Jorge Garcia), who is surveilling an antique bookstore. Jerry is convinced that the owner is a counterfeiter. But this isn’t the priority right now. Steve hasn’t gotten any information out of his military contacts, but Jerry somehow knows exactly who is manufacturing military drones in Hawaii.

501 (4)The boys discover that a surveillance drone was hijacked a couple of weeks ago. And now it’s attacked again. This time, it flies over a crowded beach and opens fire. A man calls to claim responsibility for the attacks. He says that he wants America to know what it feels like to be terrorized. McGarrett declares this an act of terrorism. The island is under lockdown.

Kono uses some tech wizardry to figure out that the caller used to work for the drone manufacturer, and he is being paid by the SRS, an international terrorist group. The SRS is also paying off another man who is wanted by the CIA for stealing and selling confidential information. Obvious, really.

Jerry, who is proving far more useful this episode than I would have imagined, tells the team he can rehack the drone if he gets close enough. Steve and Danny will be bait. They cruise the empty streets to lure the drone out. It works, and Steve takes a bullet to the leg and then complains that he can’t drive. Danny is ecstatic. Steve is grumpy. AND YOU BOTH ARE BEING SHOT AT. PLEASE PAY ATTENTION.

But in case you thought that this plot was too simple, the drone attacks were actually just a diversion to clear the streets, so that the SRS could land a plane and extract the spy before he could be arrested by the CIA. Seriously. That was the motive. Jerry shuts down the drone and sends it into the engine of the plane before it can take off. All the bad guys are arrested, and the day is saved.

One issue this show has always had is its inability to balance its characters. But if this premiere is any indication of the rest of the season, they may have finally figured it out. Here are some of the storylines that have been introduced for our characters so far:

Kono: Adam proposed, but Kono is hesitant to marry him because of all they’ve been through. She’s afraid to lose him. He promises she won’t. They share a sweet moment, but I’m not sure if they’re engaged or not.

Chin: Early in the episode, we see that Chin is being tailed by a mysterious car. Later, Chin visits Gabriel, his late wife Malia’s brother, in prison. Gabriel had tried to bribe Chin with money in an offshore account last season, and IA has been watching Chin ever since. But Gabriel refuses to come clean.

Jerry: Jerry’s ramblings about the man in the bookstore are not unfounded. The owner and another intimidating man have a photo of Jerry watching them. They know he could be a problem. (I still don’t believe that Jerry needs to be a series regular. He would be great popping up sporadically, like Toast or Sang Min. But since he’s a regular, at least they’re giving him something to do.)

Danny: There is a man in Danny’s house when he gets home. He introduces himself as Marco Reyes, and he is connected to Danny’s fugitive brother, Matt. (Remember Matt waaaay back from season 1?) Matt took something from Marco, and he wants Danny to help him get it back.

Max Bergman (Masi Oka): Max has a new mentee, Dr. Mindy Shaw (Amanda Setton). I’m sure she’ll end up dating someone.

Do you wish Danny would wear his ties more often? Do you want more Jerry or less Jerry? And what body part do I have to sell on the black market to get more McDanno couples’ counseling?

Hawaii Five-0 airs Fridays at 9/8C on CBS.

TV Families | EW.com
February 23, 1990 at 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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scale-12 padded margin-24-tb clearfix" > <div class="author-text" data-tracking-zone="author"> <div class="author-list-item"> <a class="bold author-name" href="/author/elisabeth-vincentelli/">Elisabeth Vincentelli</a> </div> <div class="timestamp published-date"> April 14, 2000 at 04:00 AM EDT </div> </div> </div> <!-- Article Content --> <div id="article-body" class="article content body clearfix" data-tracking-zone="body"> <div class="padded"> <div class="letter-grade grade-only"> <span class="letter-grade-shape"></span> <span aria-label="Letter grade">We gave it a <strong>B</strong></span> </div> <p>Being the Rolling Stones is a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Since the Stones themselves have turned into a joke, we’ll gladly take the Delta 72. Their earlier recordings were inspired by hard-driving ’60s soul, but now with <strong>000</strong> these Philly boys look back to the flamboyantly sweaty boogie Jagger & Co. played at their ’70s peak — and completely rejuvenate it. Though it doesn’t come close to the delirious energy of the band’s shows, <em>000</em> is a shot of put-your-hands-in-the-air party music. <strong>B</strong></p> <div id="karma-lazy-seriesDetails"></div> </div> </div> <!-- Syndication Attribution --> <!-- Generic Page Content --> <!-- Bottom Recirc --> <div class="bottom-recirc padded-mobile " data-tracking-zone="bottom-recirc" > <div class="component outbrain clearfix " data-action="outbrain-component" data-tracking-zone=outbrain-bottom> <div class="OUTBRAIN " data-src="https://ew.com//article/2000/04/14/000/" data-widget-id="AR_24" data-ob-template="people" > </div> </div> <div id="div-gpt-leaderboard-fixed-1" data-tier="3" class="ad ad-container ad-wrapper desktop-ad tablet-ad karma-ad" data-dimensions="728x90" role="complementary" aria-hidden="true"></div> <div id="div-gpt-mob-square-flex-1" data-tier="3" class="ad ad-container ad-wrapper mobile-ad karma-ad" data-dimensions="300x250" role="complementary" aria-hidden="true"></div> 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