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'Bones' season premiere recap: Ducks fly together

Season 10 | Episode 1 | “The Conspiracy in the Corpse” | Aired Sept 25, 2014

Bones fans, casual Bones viewers, people with hearts: If you haven’t seen the season 10 premiere, stop reading now. Maybe go watch the premiere, or maybe go make yourself a cup of tea, but either way, stop reading this. If you have seen the premiere, let’s work through what we just experienced together. It’s not going to be easy, but I’m looking at this episode like Brennan would: as a set of remains that will bring us to a very important person.

Booth is in jail. It’s been three months since the FBI framed him, claiming he murdered innocent agents in order to derail his investigation into the murder of Wesley Foster, who knew something about a serious conspiracy. Brennan’s first order of business is to get her husband out, so she combs Foster’s files until she finds information on Booth’s prosecutor, Brady. Brady’s crimes, which include witness tampering, money laundering, and accepting bribes, are enough to get him killed, and Brennan is more than ready to release that information unless Brady clears Booth of all charges. Brady asks if she has any idea what she’s doing. Brennan: “Yes. I am blackmailing you.” Oh Brennan, my fearless queen, I’ve missed you.

rsz_bones_1001-14_0093_hires2Booth isn’t happy that Brennan went behind his back, but he’s glad to be home, even if it’s not the same home he knew before. On that note, four stars for Brennan’s interior design skills, and four stars (actually, every star in the sky) for Sweets, who helped Brennan and Christine with the move. Sweets is going to be a dad, you guys. Daisy is pregnant. Booth and Brennan will of course be godparents to the smartest child in the D.C. area to ever carry on an entire conversation in emoticons.

Even with all of the good news, Booth can’t relax; his only thought is to catch whoever did this to his family. Brennan may have a lead on that. Foster’s files had information on a man named Howard Cooper, who died 16 years ago after rising quickly through the ranks at the EPA. His official cause of death was leukemia, but Brennan and company exhume Cooper’s body and confirm that the cancer never reached his bone marrow. He was murdered.

Just days before Cooper’s death, he denied a request to construct a new chemical plant, and just days after, that company applied again and was approved. Did someone kill Cooper for a permit? Booth tries to intimidate the CEO, Hugo Sanderson, but Sanderson lodges a complaint with Booth’s boss, Deputy Director Stark. Stark assigns a young agent by the name of James Aubrey (John Boyd) to keep Booth out of trouble, but Sweets promises to take full responsibility.

rsz_bones_ep1001_sc20_0088_hires2Booth doesn’t seem interested in justice anymore; he just wants revenge. He’s angry, even after a sweet night with Brennan, who pulls off his shirt, studies his bruises, and promises that she won’t hurt him. Brennan is worried, so she has lunch with Sweets to get his opinion—not as a doctor, but as a friend. Sweets explains that without the FBI on his side, Booth’s entire belief system has been shaken. Brennan agrees and tells Sweets that he’ll be a good dad.

Cooper’s bones show signs of having been in a car accident, but he went to the hospital for what he said was a fall down a flight of stairs. His doctor knew it was a hit-and-run, but the conspirators blackmailed him into keeping quiet so they could hold the hit-and-run over Cooper and force him to do their bidding. It worked until his cancer made him bold. Cooper started to fight the system, so someone killed him with an experimental antacid that was lethal in combination with his chemo drugs.

But who was blackmailing Cooper? The blackmailers had access to hospital security footage, so Agent Aubrey looks into it and finds that the security guy was a man named Gerald Norsky. After his time at the hospital, Norsky worked for a subsidiary of Sanderson Chemical. Booth and Brennan visit him at a ritzy retirement home, and while his sense of past and present seems fuzzy, he says he was an FBI agent. There’s no time to elaborate: Aubrey calls, and he needs them right away.

rsz_bones_ep1001_sc42_0122_hires2Booth and Brennan pull into a parking garage and find Sweets bleeding on the ground. He hasn’t been shot; he actually shot his attacker. (“I fought back,” he tells Booth. “You’d be proud.”) The guy got away with the evidence Sweets had on him, but that doesn’t matter anymore. Sweets is suffering massive internal trauma. He’s dying. He asks them to tell Daisy not to worry, and then he tells Booth that the world is a lot better than he thinks it is. He still believes that the world is good, even after everything that’s happened in his life. That’s our Sweets. He stops responding.

Sweets’ body bag is wheeled in to the lab with Daisy by its side. Cam says that she doesn’t think Daisy should be here for this, but Daisy insists that she needs to help, and Brennan gets it. She puts her arm around Daisy and guides her into the room as Cam unzips the body bag. It really is Sweets in there. He’s ghastly pale. Cam isn’t sure she can conduct the autopsy, but Brennan tells her to think of it as a set of remains. Those remains aren’t Sweets, but they can lead to his killer. I have no doubt that our team is going to make that killer pay.

Brennan once called Sweets their baby duck. He imprinted on her and Booth, and he made them his family. They were all lucky to have each other. I’m glad that they got to share significant moments together before he died, but beyond that, I’m still in shock. What did you think of this twist, and how are you coping?

Bones, rated TV-14, airs Thursdays at 8/7 C on Fox.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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