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'Satisfaction' recap: Can you handle the truth?

Season 1 | Episode 8 | “… Through Security” | Aired Sept 4, 2014

Oh, there are so many ways I can go with the title I’ve given this latest Satisfaction episode: Mallory’s Truth (having her husband find out about her romp with Neil); Anika’s Truth (her selfless act of encouraging Mateo to take the opportunity to record a song without her); Mateo’s Truth (realizing that he can’t settle without Anika); Neil’s Truth (realizing that he cannot be “the other man”); Adriana’s Truth (offering herself up to Neil—again); Simon’s Truth (admitting his feelings for Grace); Grace’s Truth (learning that her husband has known about her affair all along); or The Viewers’ Truth (wanting to shout the following at all of them).

you cant handle the truth

But let’s not waste too much time rehashing the details and put some of these folks on the stand, shall we?

Remember all the repeated texts Mallory Harper, Neil’s first client, was sending him in the last episode? Unfortunately, she’s not a bunny boiler—damn, that would’ve been such an exciting twist!—but a woman who told her husband the truth about her romp with an escort. It’s called honesty, folks, which after eight weeks isn’t something any of the other characters seem to understand. Seems like it might not be the best policy, however, because now the husband not only has left her, but has snapped and is out to get Neil. Or Simon. Or whoever’s name and phone number it is that the husband somehow has (I’ve lost track). Hey! Maybe the husband will be a bunny boiler!

Let’s call Neil Truman to the stand, shall we? Neil has spent countless hours over the past eight weeks contemplating his truth. I know this to be true because I’ve tried to count them and, much like Neil Truman himself, have failed miserably. But when faced with Mallory’s truthfulness, he’s forced to take another look at his, and what he sees frightens him. After calmly receiving Mallory’s news and trying to alleviate her fears—I’d have been like, WTF DO YOU MEAN YOU TOLD HIM?—Neil installs a high-level security system in his house and spends a lot of time hallucinating about meeting Mallory’s husband, as well as contemplating how it feels to be the “Simon” in their relationship. It’s distracting. Why?

you cant handle the truth

Sure, the hallucinations about Mallory’s husband shooting him don’t help much, but he realizes that this convoluted and twisted situation he and Grace are in might not be quite as black-and-white as he thought. After a night out with Grace (and Dylan—whom I still cannot figure out—and ridiculous, clingy Stephanie) that ends with Grace uncharacteristically giving her husband a sexy lap dance (sort of), it appears that he’s done with this whole truth-through-escort discovery … AGAIN.

Probably one of the most confusing characters on this show, Grace Truman can’t seem to ever figure out what her truth is. Most of the time she’s clearly an awkward, closed-off, repressed woman who plays everything in her life by the book. And by “book” I mean dusty encyclopedia. But let’s not forget that she’s also the person who started this whole domino chain of lies and deception by being very much someone who breaks the rules and lives in a web of lies and deceit. Finally being able to fulfill a huge hole in her life and being a successful designer hasn’t done much to help her figure out who she is, and the fact that she tells people like Simon and Dylan (whom she just met) things she’s never told her husband in 18 years of marriage is a pretty damn good illustration of how she really feels about him. I know your truth, Grace: You’re unhappy in your marriage and a liar and a cheater and not honest with anyone, even yourself. Oh, is that hard to hear? Sorry.

you cant handle the truth

Before we get to whistle-blower Simon‘s stand-up-and-cheer moment, let’s take a look at the rapid-fire way he got there this episode: After a conversation with Neil (who came over to warn Simon about the wrath of Mallory’s husband, who has his phone number … we think) in which Simon tells him he knows what it feels like to have feelings for someone—“You don’t have to be married to understand that”—he points out to Neil that if he cared for Grace, he’d tell her the truth.

Later, after finding out Grace is working for Adriana, Simon suddenly finds his truth and embraces it right out in the open (see main photo above). Simon cares about her! He’s in love and doesn’t care who knows it!

elf love

And as if that wasn’t enough? SIMON FINALLY TELLS HER NEIL IS A LIAR AND KNOWS EVERYTHING! Three cheers for the truth! How does Grace handle this news? She runs away. Why?

you cant handle the truth

Anika’s truth is by far the most honest of the episode. When Mateo gets signed by a record label to record their single without her, she has an introspective realization and tells him that even though she believes she needs him and is obviously hurt and disappointed, she wants him to take the opportunity. Mateo’s truth? To believe in Anika’s truth and not settle, and to pass up the deal and continue making sweet music with Anika. Sorry, Col. Jessup—looks like these two actually can handle the truth.


Neil, so terrified that Mallory’s vengeful husband is going to harm him (or his family) that he has a state-of-the-art security system installed in his house, leaves his 16-year-old daughter home alone at night. Security system or not, the jury screams GUILTY on that choice.

Grace helps herself to an unopened bottle of champagne in Adriana’s refrigerator and mixes a mimosa while Adriana is out. Bold act for such a rule-follower. Oh wait. She’s not a rule-follower. Wait. She is a rule-follower. Ah, hell, I can’t keep up.

Whatever happened to the awesome Zen master? If there was anyone who could pass judgment on everyone’s truth, it was our buddy ZM. #AreYouSatisfied? Umm, unless our buddy ZM is back next episode, I plead the fifth.

Satisfaction airs Thursdays at 10/9C on USA.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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