EW Community TV Show Episode Guides and Recaps from EW's Community

'Million Dollar Listing LA' recap: High tension, high stakes

Season 7 | Episode 3 | “Real Estate on Wheels” | Aired Sept 3, 2014

Living on the East Coast until only a few years ago, I always had a fairy-tale view of Los Angeles; stars walked the streets, everything was palm trees and blue skies, and it was where dreams came true. Having now spent time in L.A., I know this is far-from-accurate perception of the city, but I still approach it with awe and wonder. I will voraciously consume anything that takes place in the glamorous world of the rich and famous of Los Angeles, so I am incredibly excited to dive deep into this season of Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles.

Having also recently purchased some real estate (nothing even near to the level of what appears on this show), I spent a lot of time with a real estate agent. Although they were there to do all the work and negotiating, I got secondhand anxiety over all the posturing and politics of the real estate business, not to mention the schmoozing. On a list of careers that would fit my personality, real estate agent is in the bottom 1 percent, which makes me want to watch a show about real estate all the more, and to escape to a world I will (thankfully) never have to endure. Enough about me, let’s get to the three major real estate moguls.

Josh Flagg

It’s already clear that Josh is the guy we are supposed to love. He’s slick, smooth, good looking and only kind of cocky. The cockiness doesn’t rise to the level of reality show vision. He’s the guy making the snarky comments that the audience wants to hear.  He sells houses with a lot of ease, but he may be a diva in his real life. Especially when he makes his partner Colton push him to an upscale restaurant for lunch in a gold-plated wheelchair. “My sciatica is acting up again,” he whine-complains. Colton is not really buying it. I like Josh Flagg, but I may like Colton better since he reacts like this:

Watch Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles Season 7   Josh Flagg s Confined to a Wheelchair2

This week, Josh helps his friend Xander buy a multi-million-dollar investment property in Venice. You know, what normal friends do. You know Xander and Josh are friends, because they’ve both decided to grow the lazy beard, an intentional style choice to look like you haven’t shaved in a week. Josh forces Xander to push him in his gold wheelchair to all the properties, and Xander complies because he needs Josh’s real-estate wizarding skills. I drooled all over myself watching them look at several houses in the Venice Beach area, as it is my dream place to live.

Josh lets Xander walk around the place and talk to the listing agent, while Josh pretends to suffer in his chair. In a real Nellie Olsen moment, he gets up to walk around the bottom level, but hurries back to the chair when Xander is in view.

Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles Photos   Listing Recap  A Venice Beach Duplex

The place they put an offer on is incredible, with large windows and modern. modular design. Josh explains that all the techie people will want to live in the place, as it has a lot of outdoor space where they can, “I don’t know, tweet or whatever they do,” he drolls.

I wasn’t joking about Josh’s wizarding real estate skills, as his work seems to only involve calmly making a phone call with the offer, and the buyer’s agent usually accepts pretty quickly. He makes it look easy. Of course, we can’t all have the raw charisma of Josh Flagg. Xander has even found a renter to rent the entire duplex for $12K. “And I did [all of this] from a wheelchair” Josh smirks. Why is it impossible to hate him?

Josh Altman

Whereas we are destined to love Josh Flagg, this Josh is clearly set up to be our villain. High-end real estate brokers, as I’ve learned in this short time, have to have a certain type of bravado and manipulation skills, but still remain likeable. Josh Altman, however, comes across more like a guy compensating for his insecurities and always trying to prove to himself and others what a rich and successful guy he is. There’s a subtle line between confidence and bragging, and Josh has not seemed to master it yet. He and his real estate partner–brother Michael have contracted with a developer who wants to flip a home for a price of $800 a square foot. Not too shabby. Josh thinks he could sell the place for $1,000/foot, even though the developer thinks its too high. Josh tries to convince him by simply stating, “You could sell it for a thousand,” and then just staring at the developer creepily. To his credit, it works.

Josh finds a buyer who wants to lease the house for $40K a month and brings it to the developer, who dramatically rips up the offer. “I thought this would be a good deal to bring to him,” Josh semi-whines. It was a ballsy move, but even I know it was not a great idea to veer away from what the seller wanted. Sulking outside, Josh desperately calls every buyer’s agent he knows, looking for someone who would want someone to lease the place. Somehow he manages some sort of three-way switch, in which he got a new buyer for the house who would also lease the house. Regardless, Josh makes the sale, and the developer is happy. But then Josh has to ruin it with saying, “Do you feel bad that you yelled at me?” Oh Josh, just let it go and take your $137K commission.

Meanwhile, his fiancee Heather is angry with him, as usual, for not including her in wedding plans. This is her way of saying, “Shut up, I’m on the phone.”

Watch Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles Season 7   Josh and Heather s Wedding Drama

David Parnes and James Harris

The British duo is still reeling from the pressure to sell the Faring House, listed at $48 million. Last week, James had a meltdown–slash–temper tantrum about how things are going. He comes into work to see David, who is literally pounding on a keyboard randomly while giving James dirty looks. David and James go outside and apologize to each other and admit where they were wrong, a rare occurrence in a reality television show. David and James are better as a pair anyway, so I’m glad this fight wasn’t stretched out.

The good news is that they have some private showings lined up, one with a lawyer to the stars, or someone who has become rich by working with the rich. The next showing is for Dr. Sam, the world’s most successful cosmetic surgeon. Dr. Sam looks like he is entirely CGI, with a plastered on smile and perfectly coiffed hair and an impeccable suit. One can tell David and James are a bit skeeved out, but they turn on the charm nonetheless. Is it just me, or do they become more British when they are trying to woo a client?

The duo go out for a nice lunch, but lo and behold, Josh Atwood asked their assistant where they were and shows up. See, he’s still angry about last week’s incident when the duo came to his agent showing and derided him for listing it badly. Josh sends over some champagne, and bursting with excitement to confront them, joins them at their table, only to brag that he sold the aforementioned place at $7.5 million. “It’s the Harry Potter twins!” he says with a sh*t-eating grin.

James and David, however, handle this with grace. James gives an unwavering glare, and David does a spectacular eye roll. Josh continues to blather, and realizing he’s not winning this argument, basically threatens them with violence. “Josh Atwood, you’re so cringe-worthy,” which is both the absolute truth and the best insult he could give him. I want Josh to stop these antics, but would that make good TV?

James and David, despite still not having an offer on the Faring listing, celebrate with a triple date, James and his wife Valeria (rhymes with “malaria”), David and his girlfriend Adrian, and…well, look at that! It’s Mauricio and Kyle Richards from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills! Crossovers always delight me. They bitch about what a loser Josh Atwood is and toast to their success. I’ll drink to that.

Anyone care to guess how much hair-sculpting product is used per episode?

Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles airs Wednesday at 9/8C on Bravo.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

You May Like