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It's all coming crumbling down on 'Rookie Blue'

Season 5 | Episode 8 | “Exit Strategy” | Aired Aug 7, 2014

Well, guys. It looks like the price we’re going to pay for McSwarek’s happily-ever-after is every other couple at 15.

It might be worth it, though. Andy and Sam sitting in that coffee shop was the real deal. She’s angry, he’s listening. They are, finally, completely at ease with each other, sharing thoughts and feelings as couples do. But what’s really noteworthy is how well they know each other—particularly how well Sam knows Andy. It is what everyone has been waiting for. Of course it was exciting when they finally had sex, but this—the everyday ordinary moments of being in love—this is what McSwarek is all about. “Whatever gets you through the night,” Sam says. “You get me through the night,” Andy replies, without missing a beat. At last.

But some law of the universe must be that if Andy and Sam can figure out their stuff, then all the couples (and longtime friendships) around them have to crumble. As Nick prepares to lead a raid for Steve Peck at a weekly illegal poker game, Traci receives word from Dex’s fancy-shmancy lawyer that he’s going for sole custody of Leo. As she starts to panic (and wonder how he’s affording such an expensive attorney), Steve reassures her by informing her that she won’t have to worry once he makes the poker bust. He has photos of Dex attending the game every week, so he’ll certainly be there today, and once he’s been arrested, he won’t have a case for custody. Whoa, that’s some coincidence there, Steve-O.

Steve tells Traci that this information must stay between them. She understands. She’s a detective. Of course she understands the importance of keeping the details of a secret raid quiet. Except … she has to warn Dex. She tells him not to go the game if he wants to avoid being caught. And she passes on Steve’s message. No one can know about this. He, too, understands. Of course he’ll keep it a secret, because … wait, why would he keep it a secret? He wouldn’t. Duh, Traci. So Dex warns the other guys, and Steve and Nick raid the bar to find doughnuts waiting for them instead of poker players. Oh boy.

Meanwhile, Dov and Chris are in one car and Gail and Andy are in another, all patrolling the same neighborhood, because Jarvis insisted they double up their presence there. It is known to be a relatively quiet area, so it’s unclear why this is important to Jarvis. Andy is badmouthing Oliver, as is her hobby these days, and Gail is absolutely loving it. So much so that this one comment, which wasn’t even particularly mean (“It’s like he’s been deleted and replaced by company robot man”), leads to an entire episode of referring to McNally as “Mean Andy.” Gail even called her a bitch. I must’ve missed that part, ’cause the way I saw it, Andy was still mostly sweet as pie. (Oliver, on the other hand, was wearing his bossypants this week. No more Mr. Nice Guy!)

Anyway, Dov and Chris are riding along trying to get back to being normal friends after Chris spent the morning at an NA meeting that Dov forced him to go to. They get a call to respond to a house where a car has been idling in the driveway for a “prolonged period of time.” When they arrive they find the homeowner, Ewan (guest star Jeffrey Douglas), locked in his music studio (the door locks from the inside), and his stepson tied to a chair in his bedroom. Ewan and his wife, Jaclyn, were at the airport on their way out of town when he realized he forgot his passport. He returned home in the middle of a robbery. The house has been ransacked, but as the evidence is sorted through it starts looking more and more like an inside job. Turns out Jaclyn’s business is about to go under and their house is minutes away from foreclosure. Interestingly, as they miss bills right and left, their homeowner’s insurance is always paid in full.

Back at the house, Dov and Chris are finishing up at the scene. Dov runs out to the car to make a phone call and finds Chris’s phone buzzing. He looks at it and discovers that it’s his dealer letting him know when he can pick up his order. (Question: If you were trying to keep your drug dependency under wraps and you knew your dealer was going to text you, would you let your phone out of your sight for even a minute? Would you leave it unattended in a cop car?) Dov confronts Chris, who proves he’s in the throes of a battle with drugs by saying the most awful thing he could possibly have said: “I’m not your junkie brother” (referring to Dov’s brother, who also struggled with drug addiction before committing suicide). Dov shows more restraint than I would have in that he doesn’t punch Chris in face.

In interrogation, Sam gets Ewan to admit that his pot was stolen from his studio. Once his wife (guest star Kelly Fanson, who steals every scene she was in) finds out that the burglar was in the studio, she tells Andy that she had a nanny cam installed in there to see if her husband was cheating. Chris and Dov locate the camera and find a close-up shot of the thief in action. As the suspect’s face is on the screen, the stepson walks in, clearly bugs out when he sees they have photographic evidence, then goes to the studio and shoots himself in the head. Turns out he set the whole thing up with a buddy, but he wasn’t planning on getting caught. Chris and Dov hear the shot and go running into the studio, not realizing that the door closed behind them. They are now, all three, locked in the studio, with one of them bleeding out of the head, when Chris realizes that the bullet pierced a gas line and gas is leaking into the house.

Dov risks a spark from his radio blowing them all up to call in the emergency. Backup arrives, but is unable to do anything until the gas is shut down. Chris passes out and Dov manages to get the door open and get Chris out into fresh air. When they get back to the station, Chris apologizes, but Dov tells him he’s not keeping his secret anymore. If he keeps the secret, things will spiral out until he either kills himself or has an accidental overdose. “Either way,” Dov says, “I lose you.” Chris begs him not to tell Oliver. He’ll tell Oliver instead. As Chris walks off, Chloe approaches Dov to suggest they hang out. They haven’t been connecting at all recently, and Chloe is hoping to get in some quality time. Dov tells her he needs to be alone. She pushes, and he pulls away. Chris specifically asked him not to tell Chloe, so maybe he’s afraid he’ll end up telling her if they spend time together, but it seems like a particularly bad sign to me that after such a crappy day Dov would rather be alone than comforted by Chloe.

When Steve gets back from the blown raid, Traci admits to what she had done and, as expected, Steve is extremely pissed at her. As Traci is going through the evidence of the case, she realizes that the pictures of Dex are from a month before the surveillance of the poker game started. Steve didn’t find Dex while staking out the poker game; he found the poker game while following Dex. Traci demands to know why he was tailing her ex, and Steve deflects the question by reminding Traci that what she did today could have cost her her badge. Traci persists, and Steve responds by telling her he had a hunch that Dex wasn’t a good guy, and it turns out he was wrong. Oliver walks in, trying to figure out how Steve’s “sure thing” went wrong. Oliver really needed the win. Steve tells him he’s still putting it together: “My intel was wrong. I thought I knew what I was getting into.” Ouuuuch. Looks like Steve isn’t interested in being a part of what is still the Traci and Dex show. Fix this, Traci!! Have I mentioned I love Steve Peck? (This could be my motto, I know.)

No Holly. Not even a mention.

Andy decides she has to talk to Oliver or she’s not going to be able to move on. She shares her new technique with him: Act as if. Act as if everything’s OK and maybe it will be. It would be great if some of these other couples would give it a whirl.

Rookie Blue, rated TV-14, airs Thursdays at 9/8C on ABC.

TV Families | EW.com

TV Families -- We compare various television clans through the years to see how they stack up, from ''The Brady Bunch'' to ''The Flintstones''

By Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 at 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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