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'Hemlock Grove' season 2 finale recap: Love hurts

Season 2 | Episode 10 | “Demons and the Dogstar” | Released July 11, 2014

Like any good horror story, we get suckered into thinking that this Hemlock Grove finale will be quiet; a satisfying if not low-key denouement to the carnage unleashed in the previous episode. And then we hit the 20-minute mark. Not only does the storyline take off in a wholly unexpected way, but its killer cliffhanger will have audiences clamoring for a third season of this Netflix original!

The first shocker is that all the members of the killing arms of the Order of the Dragon are well and truly dead. Of course, there is still no word from the Chancellor, so whether that storyline reemerges next season remains to be seen. And because the butler has been killed, Roman, Peter and the gang are left to clean up the bodies. But Miranda, who is understandably freaking out, quickly interrupts their work. While everyone scurries off to deal with the fallout, Miranda stays back with Nadia. It’s a good thing, too, since she has gone from miraculously expressing breast milk to leaking blood.

One of the braver choices in this finale is the decision to concentrate more on Olivia’s story arc than on the show’s two heartthrobs. The result is a surprising ending that feels deserved in light of the show’s real attempts to build audience empathy toward Olivia. Norman and Sheriff Chasseur, of course, are still on a mission to kill the matriarchal upir. Norman shows up on Olivia’s doorstep with knife in hand, ready to behead his former love. She, of course, is still in the throes of an empathy overload–fueled family love-in and is delighted to see Norman. But when Olivia reveals that she has terminal cancer, Norman makes the unilateral decision to let her live, believing that the torture of a slow death befits her crimes far more than a quick beheading. He also shows his hand, which may come back to (literally) bite him.

There is a beautiful scene of Original Recipe Shelley getting ready to terminate her body while Dr. Pryce and New Recipe Shelley comfort her. After administering the medicine to kill her, the two leave Shelley to cross over on her own. While the choice makes sense for New Recipe Shelley, it’s a curious one for Pryce. Wouldn’t he want to ensure everything went off without a hitch, given his honest, emotional ties to Shelley? Instead, he spends his time filling Norman in on Shelley’s transformation. In between sniping at one another, the two realize that Olivia’s rejection by Norman has likely put Shelley at risk.

Having been relegated to the background for the past few episodes, Miranda’s story serves to set up the major story arc for season 3. Concerned about her blood-dripping breasts, she enlists the help of the world’s most friendly doctor, Dr. Spivak. While Miranda searches for answers, Destiny arrives and has visions of the snake and the Godfrey Institute. There is also a man in the shadows who is wearing a hat very similar to the one worn by Spivak.

Norman and Pryce race against the clock to revive a now-dead Shelley. It’s a good call, since Olivia is busy feasting on New Recipe Shelley in a bid to cure her cancer. Despite Original Recipe Shelley’s anguish at still residing in her old body, Norman’s actions prove fortuitous, as Pryce walks in to discover a bloody Olivia having just feasted on the carcass of New Recipe Shelley.

At Dr. Spivak’s office, we finally learn that he is the mastermind behind Miranda’s appearance in Hemlock Grove, as well as her bonding to Nadia. It seems that the not-so-good doctor chose Miranda due to her blood type, then orchestrated her car accident to put her in proximity to Roman. He is thrilled with Miranda’s milk production and the fact that it has now allowed Nadia to produce “many eggs.” To say this scene is creepy would be a vast understatement.

Suddenly, who should arrive at Spivak’s door but Olivia? She’s come to collect her granddaughter. The two get into a physical altercation and when Olivia scratches Spivak, it looks as though he has reptilian skin under his human skin. As the two throw down, Miranda seizes the opportunity to run with Nadia. The disgruntled baby nurse, Anna, who makes the mistake of grabbing Nadia, intercepts her. As Anna looks at the baby’s vivid blue eyes, Roman’s disgruntled employee’s eyes began to bleed and she keels over.

The gonad-crunching drug-dealer storyline gets wrapped up nicely when he arrives at Peter’s house and demands his money. He makes Peter strip down for another round of ball-crunching. Destiny has the misfortune of showing up, much to the thrill of the drug dealer, who is anxious to know how his equipment will work on “female body parts.” Wanting to save Destiny, Peter prepares to turn—knowing that to do so will result in his death. But a gun-toting Andreas, who clearly has his own skeletons, saves the two.

As a distraught Shelley mourns her other body, Norman decides to take off after Olivia. Miranda fills Roman in on what happened with Spivak and Olivia, and he tells her to get to the White Towers immediately. Miranda arrives with the baby and is then promptly left alone, as Roman goes to get Destiny and Peter from a surly gate guard. She takes the baby in to see the monkey, and Nadia proceeded to explode the poor animal’s head.

The inevitable Olivia-Norman confrontation comes to a head with Olivia literally ripping the heart from her former lover’s body. Olivia’s next step is to text Sheriff Chasseur a photo of Norman’s body with a warning that he is next. It’s a confrontation that the sheriff is seemingly happy to oblige.

Miranda takes to the roof, believing that suicide is the only answer for Nadia and her. As Peter and Roman beg her to reconsider, she falls from the ledge with the baby to certain death. As the two tumble back, Dr. Spivak arrives in the form of a flying dragon and takes off with Miranda and Nadia. He flies away as Olivia, Roman, Peter, Destiny and Dr. Pryce watch. Thus ends a roller coaster of a second season. The countdown to season 3 begins now!

Comments, Gripes & Observations:

  • The moment Dr. Spivak traded in his Dr. Huxtable sweater for a monotone ensemble, it was clear things were about to get real.
  • Loved the Twin Peaks reference! Part of the fun this season has been figuring out what famous horror/science fiction moments are being referenced.
  • Did anyone else find it curious that Roman had zero reaction to seeing Norman’s dead body?
  • Norman’s tirade against Olivia was a well-earned moment and finally brought the character into a position of power. It’s a shame that he met his end just as he became a force to be reckoned with.
  • Why on earth would Chasseur and Norman separate? When dealing with a bloodthirsty upir, wouldn’t there be strength in numbers?
  • The lean back by Sheriff Chasseur as he read Olivia’s death threat was pretty baller, and really reiterated who he is as a character.

Hemlock Grove can be viewed on Netflix.

TV Families | EW.com

TV Families -- We compare various television clans through the years to see how they stack up, from ''The Brady Bunch'' to ''The Flintstones''

By Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 at 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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