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CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Claire Foy as Kate Balfour (NBC)

Image Credit: Francisco Roman/NBC

'Crossbones' recap: For the love of Kate!

Season 1 | Episode 3 | “The Man Who Killed Blackbeard” | Aired June 20, 2014

The Commodore hears voices as he relaxes on his bed garbed in cool white linen — could he be experiencing another of his headaches? One of the voices is of a small child saying, “Father!”

Lowe makes love to Lady Kate, who regrets that she must leave to attend to business that requires a short jaunt to another island: a trading post on Adderley Cay. He’s concerned for her safety, but she’s done it a hundred times. When she’s gone, Lowe contemplates — is he hatching some spymaster’s scheme or does he have sincere concern for Kate?

At the brothel, Rose gets a visit from a sick employee and calls for Lowe. She’s not just sick; she’s pregnant, despite her flat belly. The fetus is breeched, and Lowe has never delivered a baby — but he read about it in a book once! He has to reach in and turn it.

The Commodore’s bloody-eyed ghostly girlfriend returns, hovering over the beach and screeching like a banshee.

As a storm roils in the distance, Lowe watches fair Kate leave on a boat through his spyglass, then makes notes on Adderley Cay in his notebook of secrets.

CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Nenna, Charles (NBC)Nenna digs up some old bones to reveal a chest with her treasures. Back at camp, she displays some booty for Charles to appraise. He accuses her of secreting wealth about her person and, as an example, draws an item from her shirt at the top of her breast. She accuses him of cheap conjuring. He asks how he would do such a thing, and she replies — by reaching in his pants. Nenna steals a kiss then throws him down. She’s a take-charge kinda gal.

Kate arrives and meets the wayward priest, Father Daniel (Hamilton Clancy), who has abandoned his vows in favor of being fruitful and multiplying, as evidenced by his many small children. Kate wants an estimate on a ruby necklace she’s brought in. The priest stalls, insisting that she try some coffee while he tumbles the gold and stones over his fingers. She doesn’t know what coffee is and isn’t really interested.

CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Blackbeard (John Malkovich), Lowe (NBC)The Commodore sings to the infant, then speaks philosophically about sin and God with Lowe when the doctor enters. The Commodore changes course from theological musings to his political tenets and predicts that this child will live free of the inequities of king and country. The Commodore also comes clean about his headaches; they’ve become more frequent and — he confesses — the apparitions are more vivid. Lowe wants to know what he’s seeing. Commodore: A specter of a woman I don’t know. “So tell me: Will I live long enough to finish what I’ve begun?” he asks.

Father Daniel notes that someone is surely missing the piece of jewelry. Kate feels uneasy: “Daniel, what have you done?” British soldiers emerge from the foliage as Daniel explains that they threatened his children. They believe she’s in possession of items stolen from the HMS Petrel. Kate stupidly pulls a sword and assaults the officer. Seeing the red coats, Kate’s boat crew sends off a pigeon.

Jagger receives news that “a young widow” (he is misinformed, as Kate is not a widow) has been captured attempting to sell some items they had planted on the Petrel for just such an entrapment. Jagger plans a voyage to visit the prisoner.

James retrieves the note from the pigeon and starts hobbling off on his crutches, presumably to make arrangements for her rescue. He hobbles past Lowe: “They’ve got her — the English.” Lowe looks queasy.

Nice ship, Jagger.

The Commodore tells Selima that Jagger has got a nasty way with women he interrogates, and that Kate will send Jagger directly to Santa Compana if she’s subjected to his usual MO. He tells Selima they have to evacuate for a time; oddly, she replies that he knows she’ll never go outside. Her choice, he says.

Bound with rope, Kate makes small talk with the officer, offering to make him rich if he unties her. She gets a punch to the belly instead.

CROSSBONES ep 103 -- John Malkovich as Blackbeard (NBC)James and Lowe watch the Commodore make his exit. James tells Lowe that Kate will die, either by the hands of the English or the Commodore. “You can’t let that happen,” James says, and confesses that he knows of Lowe and Kate’s mutual admiration. “I will beg you — if your vanity demands it.” Nenna shouts instructions for the evacuation. The Commodore has commanded Charles to stay behind to watch over Selima and make sure she does not suffer.

Making rounds, Nenna tells Rose to evacuate, then spies on the brothel owner and filches Rose’s ruby when she emerges with her treasures.

Lowe is brought to the deck of the Commodore’s ship, the Reaver. The Commodore reminds him of the punishment for stowaways. Lowe says he has a moral obligation to be there: to ensure that Kate Balfour is returned safely. The Commodore says that was his intention all along — that he intended to beat the English to Adderley Cay and buy back Kate from her captors. “I am touched by your gallantry, though,” the Commodore says. “You’ve the soul of a pirate, if the brain of a Frenchman. Leave him be, boys.”

Fletch visits the new mom and baby, telling her people fear the baby’s crying will give them away. He’s going to take her somewhere safe. (It’s an attempted redemption of Lowe’s annoyingly feebleminded assistant — he’s going to have to grow smarter, as well as braver, in my opinion.) They turn up in James and Kate’s house, gathering goods and providing some backstory: James reminisces about “the most beautiful country in the world,” Scotland, then explains that the prostitutes like this baby’s mama were property of the king on their way to India (for some unexplained reason), but were boarded by the Commodore and offered the relative safety of Santa Compana. Fletch divulges that he didn’t know his parents and has been at sea since he was 7 years old. Rowing away from the island, Fletch catches a glimpse of a ragged man on the shore.

Selima asks Charles why he’s not with the Commodore: “He loves you, you know.” Charles tells her how he used to proudly serve under Blackbeard, but now all he gets are Bible stories. Then he tells the story of the Prodigal Son. “What is the point of Bible stories between a man like him and a man like me?” Charles asks. Not sure why we’re suddenly getting theatrics from Charles — he’s pissed he had to stay behind to ensure Selima’s safety? Is that any less of a duty than standing at Blackbeard’s side on the Reaver?

CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Jagger (NBC)Seated before Jagger, Kate wriggles in her binds. “Do you know me?” Jagger asks. He’s the governor. “I’m the man who killed Blackbeard — well, purportedly.” He knew he didn’t kill Blackbeard. The head he held was that of someone who closely resembled Edward Teach. I know you’re his shill, Jagger says. You’re mistaken, Kate says. He shows her the jewels he planted. She says she bought them from a tattooed Irishman and makes up a ship’s name. Jagger starts slapping her around and kicks her so that she falls back to the ground. He’s on her immediately, caressing her and vowing that she will tell him the truth, as she protests and swears her innocence.

Charles fights with Selima to get her to leave. She accidentally/on purpose stabs him.

CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Blackbeard (John Malkovich), Lowe (NBC)“Too late,” the Commodore says, looking through the spyglass. “That’s William Jagger’s ship, the Eldridge: 100 guns, 400 men.” Lowe: What’s happens next? She’ll tell him where we are, because he won’t give her an alternative, and he’ll come with a fleet “and wipe us from the face of the Earth,” says the Commodore.

Jagger marches Kate to an open coffin, and then removes her blindfold. CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Jagger, Kate (NBC)Jagger: Where is Edward Teach? Give me Blackbeard, and I will spare you. She won’t do it, so Jagger punches her, his men throw her into the coffin and they bury her alive. Her screaming can be heard through the dirt above. Jagger hears cannon fire: “My God. It’s Blackbeard. He’s come for her!”

Cauterizing his wound, Charles finds out that Selima fears people. Selima finds out that the Commodore told Charles to kill her — if he had to. But Charles says he wouldn’t be able to do it. She’s moved by his loyalty and kisses him. Apparently not hurt too badly, he lifts her onto the table, raising her skirts.

Jagger urges his crew to catch up with Blackbeard and the Reaver, but then sees that there’s no one on the quarterdeck. He deduces that Blackbeard isn’t aboard her, then sees a sloop flying Blackbeard’s flag and commands the ship to turn about in pursuit — surely Jagger can’t be that dumb, can he?

CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Lowe (Richard Coyle)(NBC)Kate continues screaming below the ground, while the Commodore, dressed a bit like V in V for Vendetta (mask and all — where’d that come from?), emerges from the foliage and shoots two redcoats dead. Lowe kicks another. Sword fighting all around. Lowe kills one of his countrymen — and no one is even looking when he does it! — for taking Kate, I suppose.

CROSSBONES ep 103 -- Charles, Selima (NBC)Charles and Selima face each other. Their passion, when “resolved,” becomes an uncomfortable aggression. She pushes him away. He leaves in a huff, and Selima’s expression seems to say, “This is definitely going to be a problem.” Probably an intense and recurring problem — just guessing.

Lowe pulls Kate from her grave. She collapses into his kisses. Blackbeard watches through the spyglass as Jagger prepares to board the small vessel, which is manned by a dead guy and explodes before they get near it.

Back on the Reaver, the Commodore tells Kate that she should thank Lowe. She apologizes for all the trouble, but the Commodore takes responsibility. Kate wanders over to Lowe, who holds her hand.

Back on Adderley Cay, Jagger discovers the empty grave and dead soldiers. Curses! Foiled again!

Back on Santa Compana, Kate embraces James, who peers over her shoulder at Lowe, then kisses her.

Back at the house, the Commodore approaches Selima, who cringes noticeably at his touch.

Crossbones, rated TV-14, airs on Fridays at 10/9 C on NBC.

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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