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'Undateable' recap: Don't just stand there, bust 'The Move'

Season 1 | Episode 7 | “The Move” | Aired June 19, 2014

She was not dressed in yellow and he did not say “hello,” but there were definitely a lot of busted moves in this episode. Nicki is coming back to town for a visit for the first time since she left to be close to her mother, and Justin has big plans to remain horizontal for the majority of her stay. Danny cautions Justin to take a step back in order to respect Nicki’s feminine emotions. He shouldn’t shuffle her into the bedroom just as she walks through the door.

Has he never met Danny before?

Nicki rushes in and jumps into Justin’s waiting arms. He pushes her off, explaining that he values her brains as well as her brawn. I love that she takes him by the shoulders and asks, “Did Danny mess with your head?” Baby Bird nods in embarrassment, Danny laughs hysterically and Nicki literally throws Justin over her shoulder and carries him into the bedroom. All that was missing was an animal-skin toga and a wooden club.

Nicki enters the bar the next day and is immediately scooped up into a friend sandwich consisting of Burski, Brett and Shelly. (Sorry, Burski. The boob you grabbed was Shelly’s. Better luck next time.) Nicki excuses herself to call her mom when Justin begins freaking out, claiming that Nicki must be cheating on him. Apparently she brought some advanced, Cirque du Soleil-quality moves to the boudoir, and he was genuinely afraid for his life. Leslie assures Justin that he has nothing to worry about. Nicki simply read something in a magazine that she wanted to try.

Justin becomes insecure, thinking he needs to return the favor with an equally impressive move. Never fear, Baby Bird. Danny has just The Move for this situation. It’s part Daniel Larusso and part principal ballet dancer. Danny dips into a deep plié, showcasing the flexibility required for The Move. Justin attempts to mirror his mentor, but he’s about as flexible as wrought iron in frozen tundra. Annoyed, Justin scoffs at Danny, claiming he doesn’t need The Move.

Moments later, we find Justin desperately begging Danny for The Move. Danny allows the power to wash over him and insists that Justin apologize to The Move — with an Italian accent, since Danny invented The Move in Italy. After a hilarious conversation in which Brent Morin performs what sounded like an amalgamation of Spanish and Indian, Danny is convinced he’s ready to see the diagram that details the intricacies of The Move.

UndateableThe next day, Nicki can’t stop talking about The Move. Danny is mad that he is receiving zero credit for schooling Justin on how to show Nicki a good time. Just as Danny is about to claim The Move as his own, Justin makes him promise he will never tell Nicki that he is the actual engineer of The Move. Danny answers with an eye roll and deep plié.

That night, Justin and Nicki prepare to go to Pleasure Town. Nicki sidles up next to him, asking if he will do The Danny.

Mamma mia!

An irate Justin storms into the bar — because where else would you go in a moment like this? — furious that Danny told Nicki he was the father of The Move. Brett is intrigued and asks if The Move works on guys.

Danny assures him that The Move does not discriminate. He suggests Brett sing to The Move, and in a heartbeat, David Fynn busts out a truly remarkable version of “Funiculi, Funicula.” I was majorly impressed and equally intrigued as to why the show doesn’t utilize him more.

Justin is flustered. Why did Danny blatantly ignore his request? It was simple: Don’t tell Nicki that The Move was his brainchild. Danny was confused, claiming that he only wanted credit for what he invented. Justin leaves, vowing to never perform The Move again. Nicki follows, begging him to reconsider his declaration.

Leslie scolds her brother for turning on Justin, even though he knows that Baby Bird is insecure when it comes to women. Danny stares at her with a blank face. Leslie rolls her eyes and begins to explain what the word “insecure” means. The entire exchange was a well-written bit, and Chris D’Elia’s careful delivery of the word “in-sack-ure” had me rolling (see the “Quotables,” below).

Danny later apologizes to Justin, admitting that doing things for others out of the goodness of his heart is a new concept to him. He tells Justin that Nicki is totally out of his league, but he deserves her. Then he instructs Baby Bird to create a move called The Justin. I’m guessing it will be part Barry Manilow and part accountant.

The B-story was extremely entertaining as well. According to Shelly, they’ve taken nature’s miracle of the female reproduction system and made a bar game out of it. Brett claims he can make Leslie cry by uttering only four words: soldier, dad, surprise and homecoming. But all bets are off when they discover that Burski hasn’t cried since he was 5 years old. Shelly claims Burski is emotionally constipated and is shocked when even the video about the lion remembering his owners doesn’t elicit a tear.

Burski is still devoid of emotion when his friend tells him the story of a young Shelly who was diagnosed with what doctors described as “a big-ass head.” Even that doesn’t work. What finally breaks Burski is when Danny pays him a compliment. Cue the waterworks!

Undateable Quotables:

Justin: Are you really trying to help me or just messing with my head?
Danny: Why can’t it be both?

Leslie: She read something sexy in a magazine that she wanted to try.
Justin: It was scary. It was terrifying.
Shelly: Uh-oh. Somebody’s thumb went somewhere!

Danny: I’ve got a move that is insanely crazy. But you have to be just like the Karate Kid. Part of your body waxes on while the other part waxes off.

Leslie: You know Justin feels insecure.
[Danny looks confused.]
Leslie: Oh, right. You see, being insecure is when you doubt yourself and your abilities.
Danny: That’s so sad. Is that a real thing?
Brett: Yes, and that’s why I’ve yet to wear my European bathing suit in the States.
Leslie: You need to put yourself ahead of your friends’ feelings.
Danny: I don’t like that. It makes me feel in-sack-ure.
Leslie: That’s not what that means.

Undateable, rated TV-14, airs Thursdays at 9/8 C on NBC

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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