Season 1 | Episode 4 | “Know Thy Selfie” | Aired May 13, 2014
Tuesday’s Faking It shows us, for the first time, what it looks like when Amy and Karma are apart (for 12 hours and 32 minutes, as of the beginning of the episode). “Know Thy Selfie” picks up right after the fallout from the protest, with Amy ignoring Karma after their fight, and struggling with her feelings after admitting the truth about their one-sidedly fake relationship to Shane.
But even though the episode shows the leading ladies living separately and dealing with their issues solo (even if it’s only for a day), and even though it’s an Amy-heavy episode, it’s Shane (played brilliantly by Michael Willett) who really steals the show. Also, your life would be better if he were your GBF. No, really. Here’s why (from this week’s episode alone):
1. He’s smart — and you have to be too, if you want to fully appreciate his brilliant snark.
Like any good friend, Shane is the go-to for help and advice. When Amy runs to him for help finding a new girlfriend (a real one, to distract her from her romantic feelings for fake GF/BFF Karma), Shane goes into safe mode, proceeding with the caution of a man who isn’t sure that she’s not faking. His amazing quip is the best, and Willett delivers it with blink-and-you’ll-miss-it speed and ease. The line: “If these people find out you’re faking it, they will lynch you and not even notice the irony.” Funny and smart: Yes, please. He’s definitely best-friend material.
2. He’s willing to direct his sarcasm at his friends.
Who wants a friend who constantly placates you? Shane knows how to throw light, well-intentioned barbs that can call a friend on BS without being mean.
3. He’s always there for his friends, but he never loses himself.
Yes, Shane will always help a friend in need, but he’s no pushover, and he’s nobody’s sidekick. He always has his own motivation and point of view. On the subject of helping Amy find a new girlfriend: “I’m going to agree. Both because I can see you’re in pain and because I’m dying to see how this plays out.”
4. He talks like a character from a Tina Fey script.
In his quest to help Amy find a new, real girlfriend, Shane takes her to a lesbian coffee shop. His description of it is pure gold. “The Twain: Lesbian coffee shop by day, gay bar by night and ne’er the twain shall meet … What’s your flavor? We got your lipsticks. We got your sporties. We got your Kristen Stewart groupies, or are you more classic butch? … Who here makes your no-no place say yes-yes?”
5. He’s honest and will tell you when you need check yourself.
Amy is the worst at picking up girls. It’s like watching a bad pickup artist crash and burn. It’s like watching that poor woman lose on Family Feud. When she comes back to him for feedback: “You were lewd and aggressive and overly sexual.”
6. He has his finger on the pulse of technology.
When Amy needs a new way to look for a girlfriend, Shane has her back, ready to direct her to the fictional lesbian version of Grindr: “There’s an app for that. It’s called Syzzr.”
7. He’s not afraid to admit when he’s wrong.
When Amy posts a questionable About Me to her Syzzr profile, Shane is skeptical. He doesn’t think it’s possible she could find a viable GF candidate with her list of things she hates (including, but not limited to, reggae music and people who buy jeans with holes in them). Shane’s change of tune is so quick and effortless:
Amy: “I’m already faking one relationship. If I’m gonna have a real one, I want her to like me for me.”
Shane: “That’s not how online dating works. If you get a hit off this, it’s gonna be a (PING from the app) … miracle. Bet she’s a bow-wow. Only desperate people respond that fast. (Looks at the pic) Oh my God. Super-cute.”
8. He’ll try to give you the standard good advice, but he won’t push it when he knows it doesn’t apply to you.
Case in point — this conversation as Amy gets dressed for her date, Jasmine from Syzzr:
Shane: “What happened to just wanting to be yourself?”
Amy: “That was before she was cute. And myself would wear my doughnut shirt and bacon sweats.”
Shane: “It IS unfortunate that your favorite clothes are food-themed.”
9. He’s not squeamish about dishing out the super-personal advice you really need.
“Don’t let her rub your bottle until at least the second date, OK, Genie?”
10. He’ll even help his enemies when the occasion calls.
When Amy leaves for her date, Shane hangs out at her house to wait for her. His arch-nemesis Lauren’s room is right across the hall, and he can’t resist taking a peek inside the Queen Wannabe’s bedroom. Unfortunately, she’s in there, naked and trying to master the art of the sexy-but-not-life-ruining selfie. Shane to the rescue.
Then, Saint Shane even helps Lauren take the perfect picture.
Lauren: “Wow … I look —”
Shane: “Banging. I know. And you didn’t even have to show your boobs. I just can’t stop changing lives today.”
No, you really can’t stop, can you, Shane?
11. He ‘fesses to reading your diary, and it’s OK because you tell him all your secrets anyway.
When Amy walks in on him reading her journal: “I swear, I was just skimming it. Though that crush on the lifeguard last summer; interesting twist.”
12. He helps you brainstorm your options.
13. As honest and real and perfectly snarky as he can be, at the end of the day, he knows just what you really need to hear, and he’s hoping it’s true right along with you.
When Amy can’t bring herself to even hope that Karma might feel the same way about her, especially given her unhealthy obsession with Liam Booker, Shane draws from personal experience to explain why there’s still hope.
“Classic overcompensation. I pined over Emily Michaels, the most unavailable girl in third grade, because deep down, I didn’t want her to be available. Happens all the time.”
Basically, he’s the perfect best friend and perfect human being. What do you think? Which Faking It character would you want as your all-time BFF?