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Mikael Mikaelson of 'The Originals': Everything you need to know

At the end of last week’s episode of The Originals, we saw Mikael (Klaus and Elijah’s dead father) attempting to weasel his way back into the land of the living by trying to strike a deal with teen witch Davina. In tonight’s episode, “The Battle of New Orleans,” we don’t know if Davina will actually succeed in bringing him back before “The Other Side” gets sucked into a black hole forever, but she is a teenage girl. No offense to Davina, but when we were her age, our brains didn’t go past expanding our Hollister wardrobe and wondering why our parents wanted to ruin our lives, so the probability of her making a rash decision is high.

With Mikael promising to rid Davina of Klaus forever, she might just shake on his deal. Just in case she decides to make this horrible decision, here are eight things you need to know about Mikael Mikaelson (besides the fact that his name is positively ridiculous):

He’s the worst dad in the world: Mikael has not been as extensively discussed in The Originals as he has been in its parent show, The Vampire Diaries. But whether you’ve seen The Vampire Diaries or not, it’s evident that he isn’t (nor was he ever) “Dad of the Year.” Not only did he abuse Klaus when he was young, but he is hell-bent on killing him, even from beyond the grave.

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He created vampires: In this mythology, the whole vampire business stemmed from an incident with Mikael’s son whom you might not even know about. The main Mikaelson children are Klaus, Elijah, Rebekah, Finn and Kol. However, they had another sibling named Henrik, who was killed by werewolves when he was just a wee lad. This is what triggered Mikael and Esther’s (his wife) desire to turn their children into bloodthirsty creatures of the night. Apparently that was the only way to protect their children. Moving out of town, building a wall, coming up with a protection spell and not going into the woods where the werewolves live were all unacceptable options. Makes sense, I guess. Look at the guy — he’s a raging lunatic.

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He’s a hypocrite: Like we said, he’s the one who turned his children into the monsters they are, yet he wants to kill them and blame them for their transgressions. Sure, he hates Klaus most of all because he’s the result of an affair his wife had with a werewolf — but again, not Klaus’ fault. If you ask us, Esther is the one who should be hunted down for all eternity. #SkankyMomProblems

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He’s a hypocrite times two: He hates vampires more than anything, yet he is a vampire.

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Yup, you heard that right. Because he hates his vampire brood so much, he turned himself into a powerful vampire that only feeds on other vampires. The guy’s a whack job.

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Unparalleled patience: If you never watched The Vampire Diaries, you may not know this, but Mikael took a 20-year-long nap in a tomb after Abby Bennett (a witch) imprisoned him there. The tomb was in Charlotte, North Carolina. While we’re not judging anyone, if they really didn’t want him to be found and awakened, maybe they could have hidden him somewhere further. Alaska? Greece? Djibouti? Seriously, anything other than the next state over would have been more effective.

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Klaus defeated him once: In season 3 of The Vampire Diaries, Klaus and Mikael came head-to-head when Katherine (a bitchy vampire doppelgänger) woke Mikael from his tomb. Mikael almost had the upper hand, but in the end it was Klaus who defeated him. No doubt Mikael will be looking to even the score this time around. No death or supernatural imprisonment can hold this guy back!

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He’s got two first names: Mikael Mikaelson. Really? His parents were just asking for him to get beat up. He was probably teased so much as a child that his rage and bitterness carried with him to adulthood. No wonder he’s so pissed off all the time.

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We might be screwed: Legend has it that a stake made from a white oak tree is the only thing that can kill an original vampire. Klaus already stabbed and killed Mikael with one of these stakes, so if he comes back from “The Other Side,” how will he be killed this time? If you think you have daddy issues, put yourself in Klaus’ shoes.

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We’ve said Klaus is the ultimate TV villain, but if Mikael is brought back, could he dethrone his son and claim the title as TV’s new big bad? How do you feel about the prospect of Mikael being brought back from the dead?

Share your thoughts and predictions on how the end of season 1 will shake out. Until next time … #FangsOut.

xoxo,

TeamTSD

TV Families | EW.com
Mark Harris
February 23, 1990 AT 05:00 AM EST

The Bradys are back, with a passel of 90’s hassles. Do they represent the typical American Family? Did they ever? Who does? Stare and compare!

Kind Of Family
TheBradyBunch 1969-74: Blended
The Bradys 1990-: Enormous
Married…With Children 1987-: Postnuclear
Thirtysomething 1987-: Extended
The Flintstones 1960-66: Modern Stone Age

Family Pet
The Brady Bunch: Tiger
The Bradys: Alice
Married…With Children: Buck
Thirtysomething: Grendel
The Flintstones: Dino

Typical Guest Star
The Brady Bunch: Davey Jones
The Bradys: There’s no room
Married…With Children: Sam Kinison
Thirtysomething: Carly Simon
The Flintstones: Ann Margrock

Expression Of Joy
The Brady Bunch: Groovy!
The Bradys: Ritual hugging
Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.”
Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you?
The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…”
The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been)
Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!”
Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?”
The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical Problem
The Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen.
The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed.
Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents.
Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer.
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical Solution
The Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens.
The Bradys: Bobby gets married.
Married…With Children: They hate him.
Thirtysomething: If only we knew…
The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

House Style
The Brady Bunch: Conservative but mod, circa ’69
The Bradys: Conservative but mod, circa ’90
Married…With Children: Roach motel
Thirtysomething: Enviable
The Flintstones: Suburban cave

Clothing Style
The Brady Bunch: Early Osmonds
The Bradys: Made in the USA
Married…With Children: Flammable fabrics
Thirtysomething: Eclectic earth tones; nice ties
The Flintstones: One-piece

Most Annoying Character
The Brady Bunch: Alice’s cousin Emma, the substitute housekeeper (too strict)
The Bradys: Marcia’s husband, Wally (chronically unemployable)
Married…With Children: Steve (supercilious)
Thirtysomething: Ellyn (goes through Hope’s drawers, babbles, changes hairstyle every other week, generally mistreats her friends)
The Flintstones: Mr. Slate (bossy)

Attitude Toward Sex
The Brady Bunch: Never heard of it
The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it!
Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No.
Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident.
The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses Fight
The Brady Bunch: They don’t.
The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens
Married…With Children: Tooth and nail
Thirtysomething: They stop talking
The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into Trouble
The Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette.
The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair.
Married…With Children: By committing felonies
Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket.
The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.”
The Bradys ”Next time, ask.”
Married…With Children: By the authorities
Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face.
The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For Fun
The Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon
The Bradys: Has flashbacks
Married…With Children: Exchanges insults
Thirtysomething: Talks
The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved Mysteries
The Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die?
The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair
Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use?
Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other?
The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst Behavior
The Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

The Bradys: Marcia’s son Mickey watches Bobby’s car-crash tape for fun.
Married…With Children: The Bundy’s kill their neighbor’s dog.
Thirtysomething: Elliot has an affair and talks about it.
The Flintstones: Characters don’t wear under-clothes.

Best Reason To Watch
The Brady Bunch: This is what life should be.
The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now!
Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it.
Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life.
The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To Watch
The Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses.
The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now.
Married…With Children: She has a point.
Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real.
The Flintstones: The Simpsons

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